


Secrets to the Grave

by boredomsMuse



Series: Evil is Not a Trait [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Because fuck canon, F/M, Good Severus Snape, Good Slytherins, M/M, Severus Snape can talk to snakes, Spying Slytherins, also
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-20
Updated: 2019-11-02
Packaged: 2020-03-08 13:31:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 24,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18895585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boredomsMuse/pseuds/boredomsMuse
Summary: Severus never meet for anyone to find out.  Yet as the circle that knows grows larger, he starts to think that maybe it's not a bad thing.





	1. Lily

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so this one won't all be uploaded at once like the previous one, also you thought I rewrote stuff in BBOS? Boi are you in for a shock.
> 
> Most of the rewriting will happen in the actual chapters, obviously, but an important note is James Potter and the fact he is a terrible, horrible bully in canon and I don't like that. That whole being pants in public thing that happened? No. Nothing like that ever happened in this au. Because _what the fuck_. 
> 
> In this the Marauders were still jerks, but they weren't nearly as bad as canon. They played mostly harmless pranks, and mocked Sev in their spare time. They were not nice to him, but they were not nearly so horrible. And they did eventually grow up.
> 
> Although, the whole 'tell sev to go to the shrieking shack' thing did still happen, but that'll get way more context in the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this one won't all be uploaded at once like the previous one, also you thought I rewrote stuff in BBOS? Boi are you in for a shock.
> 
> Most of the rewriting will happen in the actual chapters, obviously, but an important note is James Potter and the fact he is a terrible, horrible bully in canon and I don't like that. That whole being pants in public thing that happened? No. Nothing like that ever happened in this au. Because _what the fuck_. 
> 
> In this the Marauders were still jerks, but they weren't nearly as bad as canon. They played mostly harmless pranks, and mocked Sev in their spare time. They were not nice to him, but they were not nearly so horrible. And they did eventually grow up.
> 
> Although, the whole 'tell sev to go to the shrieking shack' thing did still happen, but that'll get way more context in the future.

The tunnels under the school are a lot colder than Lily remembers them being.  She should have grabbed a heavier jacket. Or better yet, she should just turn around and forget all about Severus and his stupid note.

_'I'll wait at our spot every night after curfew.  Please meet me there, I need to apologize. -Sev’_

The note had been resting on her pillow three days ago and Lily had been trying her best to ignore it.  If Severus can't apologize properly, she doesn't want to hear it. That’s what she’d told herself when she first saw the note, and that’s what she’d been reminding herself every night since.

The problem is she _does_ want to hear it.

Lily has played that moment over and over in her head but she just can't figure it out.  Why had Severus called her that? She knows they haven't been as close this year, that he's been spending time with… a bad crowd.  But Lily knows what Severus’ like. That person who insulted her? That wasn't her Sev. No way he's changed that much, she just can't believe it.

She wants answers more than she wants an apology.  That's why Lily continues down the tunnels, despite the freezing cold and her burning anger.

Of course, she'll still be getting that apology.  But that can wait until after Severus’ explained himself.

Severus is already sitting at their spot when she turns the corner, curled up with his head between his knees.  He doesn't look up as she approaches, instead tensing. Lily doesn't take it the wrong way, Severus is always expecting the worst these days.  Sometimes she wonders what happened to the confident boy that made flowers bloom for her.

“Severus?”  She calls, voice quiet as to not startle him further.  His head snaps up at her voice, and the sheer relief on his face is enough to banish any lingering regret Lily might have.

“Lily.”  He breathes, scrambling to his feet.  Lily notes that he looks skinnier than normal.  That'd almost be impressive if it wasn't so concerning.  “You came.  Thank you.  I'm so sorry.  I never wanted to hurt you.”  He says quickly, trying to get everything out at once. Lily sighs. Part of her wants to make this easy for him, because his regret is plain as day.  But most of her is hurt, and mad, and confused.

“But you knew that word would hurt me.”  She says, because there's no way Severus hadn't.  “And now you won't even apologize in public Sev. Do your new friends really matter that much more than me?”

“Of course not,” Severus says, in a tone of voice she's learnt not to doubt.  But then he steps back again, curling in on himself. “But I, I can't...  It's complicated.” He mumbles. There’s more to be said there, Lily knows it.  She wants to trust him, and even after everything, she does.

“Okay.”  She accepts.  “You'll just have to make it up to me.”

“Anything.”  Sev agrees, face lighting up.

“Don't join the deatheaters.”  He deflates at her demand and Lily frowns.  Surely he doesn't _want_ to join them.

“I have to,” Sev claims, not sounding particularly happy about it.

“No you don't Sev,” Lily assures. “I know things have been hard for you, but you have me.  And if you're worried they'll hurt you, I'll protect you.”

“You don't understand.”  Sev shakes his head. “It's not that.”

“Then what is it?”  Lily asks. “You can trust me Sev, we used to tell each other everything.”  She pleads when he hesitates. Sev bites his lip a moment before sighing.

“Dumbledore asked me to spy on them.”  He admits, barely louder a whisper. Lily feels her heart freeze.  Dumbledore asked him to spy? On the deatheaters? They're already known to be brutal, to be lethal, and they call people traitor simply for not joining them.  What would that kind of group do to a spy?

Lily doesn't want to imagine it.

“Why you?”  Is all she can manage to ask, fear stealing most of her words.

“He noticed they took an interest in me, in my potions,” Severus mumbles, shrugging awkwardly. “I wasn’t going to get involved, but he said I could really help if I fed him information.  That I could protect people, you.” He continues when Lily doesn’t reply immediately. She doesn’t know what to say.

“You’re doing this for me?”  She frowns. “Sev you shouldn’t be doing this for me.  We’re sixteen, you shouldn’t be spying! If you’re found out-” Lily can't finish the sentence, choking on the words.

“They’ll kill me.”  Sev says it for her, with much too much ease.  “I know. But you’re my only friend Lily, I can’t just… if I can help stop people that would hurt you I have to.” He says, in that same tone she can't doubt.  That reflection of the boy who made flowers bloom. “That’s, that’s why I can’t apologize in public. It’s why I said it in the first place. I’m sorry. Please don’t hate me Lily.  Please.”

“Oh Sev.”  Lily breaths, pulling her best friend into her arms.  “I don’t hate you, I promise. I could never hate you.”  She holds Sev tighter as he starts to sob.

“Thank you.”  He manages, sounding like Lily is the only thing keeping him together right now.  She probably is. God, Lily thinks. She guides them to sit down and tries her damndest to keep it together.  Her best friend is a spy.  A spy that will most definitely be killed if he’s caught, probably painfully.

And for the last three days, he’s felt utterly alone in that.

Lily regrets not coming down earlier.  If she could go back, she’d already be waiting for Sev on that first night.  

But she can’t go back, all she can do is hold Sev tight and promise she’ll always be there for him.  No matter what. She doesn’t get back to the castle until breakfast, but that’s something she doesn’t regret.

“You were late,” Alice comments the next morning as they eat.

“I slept in,” Lily claims.

“You don’t look like you slept at all.”  Frank points out, but puts his hands up in surrender at the glare she shoots him.    

“You know, you’re glaring awfully hard in Professor Dumbledore’s direction.”  Alice, who has never shared her boyfriend's ability to stop, says. “Did you get detention or something?”

“It’s nothing,” Lily claims, dragging her eyes away from Dumbledore.  There was one other thing she’d promised Sev last night, after all.

She’d take his secret to her grave.  Even if that meant she couldn't give the headmaster a piece of her mind for doing this to him.


	2. Molly

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright I am quite a few chapters ahead, so imma post an extra upload. Also James/Lily/Sev shall be sprinkled in all the places, thank you to Vonnix, Mostly_Void_Partially_Stars, and Dianvie for your comments ^^
> 
> Also big thanks love_bookswillbetheendofme who left a comment of every chapter of BBOS the other day and is 100% the reason beyond my posting this.
> 
> Also also, adopting people runs in the family

“Dumbledore has a spy.”  Molly mutters to herself as she kneads dough in the middle of the night.  She already knew this. Everyone in the inner circle of the Order knows about Dumbledore's spy.

"The spy knows where I live.”  She adds as begins to cut out the dough, placing each circle on her baking tray.  This is something she didn't already know, but it's not particularly surprising. A smart spy would have access to multiple people, not just Dumbledore, and a dumb spy would be long dead by now.

“And the spy is on their way here, now.”  She says, pacing as the dough bakes. This is incredibly surprising news.  The identity of Dumbledore's spy is an oft debated fact among the Order members that know.  Dumbledore has told none of them his name, let alone allowed them to meet him. Of course the secrecy is understandable, spying us a dangerous job.

What she doesn't understand is why the bloody spy is on their way to her burrow.

‘ _ I will be arriving within the hour - SS’ _ , that was the incredibly unhelpful note that had woken her up.  Molly had been more than a little confused before she’d recalled ‘SS’ was how the spy always signed his notes.  Now she’s up in the middle of the night, making scones and hoping desperately this doesn’t wake up her boys.  It’s hard enough to get Charlie to bed, let alone the young twins.

The knock comes just as Molly pulls the scones from the oven.  A soft enough noise that she almost misses it until it comes again.

“Coming, coming.”  She calls, her own voice soft.  The spy stands on the other side of that door, likely with important information.  Molly takes a moment to imagine a grizzled looking man that would fit right at home among the deatheaters, and then she opens the door.

To a child.

There’s nothing else to describe the skin and bones standing on the far edge of her welcome mat.  He’s curled up some, with long and messy black hair and skin too pale to be healthy. His robes are as dark as his hair but Molly notices the way they cling to his leg.  He’s hurt.

“Here.”  He says, practically shoving a bag into her hand.  “Make sure Dumbledore gets them, sorry for disturbing your night.”  Without another word, he’s turning back down the pathway. 

“Now hold on a second.”  Molly frowns, quickly grabbing the edge of his robe sleeve.  Thankfully her children give her lots of practice grabbing moving targets.

“Is there something wrong?”  The spy asks, frowning back.

“You’re injured!”  Molly states. “And you look like you haven’t had a proper meal in, well, ever.” 

“So?”  The boy frowns deeper, looking genuinely confused by her concern.  Oh Dumbledore had best hope she doesn’t get her hands on him for doing this to a  _ child _ .

“Come inside.”  Molly instructs.  “I’ll fix both those things up.”

“I can’t.”  The boy refuses.  “I have to go, and you have to take those vials to Dumbledore.  I couldn’t get there without being noticed.” 

“Well, if you walk out I might just forget to send these vials.”  Molly threatens. “You’ll have to come in to make sure that I do it.”

“You’d risk everything the Order works for just so I’d come inside?”  The boy asks, twisting her words in a way she assumes an intentional effort to make her back down.  He'll have to try harder than that.

“I'd hand the Order over to the Nameless Twat himself if it means keeping you from bleeding out." Molly claims.  

“That’s ridiculous.”  He decides, trying to hide his blushing cheeks under a scoff.  It hurts to see. All Molly wants is to pull this child into her arms and be the mother he clearly never had.  But she has the impression that would be too much for him.  She'll have to settle for looking after that leg of his and work her way up to hugs.

“Ridiculous people are notorious for being stubborn, you'd best just come in.”  She says, free hand on her hip and lips pulled into a kind smile. He hesitates another moment before sighing.

“Only to make sure you send it."  He gives in.  Smile widening, Molly gently leads him to the couch.  

"Take a seat, I'll go get the supplies."  She instructs.

"Aren't you worried I'll get blood on your couch?"  He frowns.  

"Nothing a quick spell can't fix."  She assures him. "I've gotten quite good at those."  Molly adds, with much less joy. "Now sit, and don't you go anywhere or who knows what will happen to that bag of yours."  Trusting him to listen, Molly leaves to grab her first aid kit. She places the spy's bag on the kitchen bench as she passes it, intending to deal with it later.

"Did you send the bag?"  The boy asks when she returns, clearly noting her lack of it.

"What did I tell you dear?  Your leg first." Molly reminds. 

"It really is more important."  He stresses. 

"If we couldn't spare an hour, Dumbledore would have called the Order together already."  Molly points out. Even if the spy had brought the information to her, she knew Dumbledore must have had some sort of briefing already.  

"Would he have?"  The boy mumbles. Molly doesn't answer, focus moving to his leg.  She had trusted Dumbledore blindly once, before her boys had come into the world.  Countless books on parenting and learning her impact on impressionable young minds had opened her eyes to just want Dumbledore did to those around him.  But he's the leader they have, and one that would not be easy to replace. She just wishes the others, especially the younger members, didn't think him so infallible.  

Seeing this boy's expression, disillusioned and lacking a fire half as strong as James or Sirius, she wonders if this is really any better.

"You've had quite the number down on your leg."  She comments, one part wanting to distract herself and one part curious.  The boy winces, though clearly not in response to Molly cleaning out the wound.

"It was a warning shot."  He admits. "I was caught where I wasn't meant to be."  Molly looks up, frowning.

"Do the deatheaters suspect anything?"  She asks. If they do she can't let him go back. 

"No.  He thought it was an accident, or I'd already be dead." He explains.  "But the Nameless Twat couldn't just let me go unpunished." He adds, using Molly's nickname with a hysterical laugh.  The hysteria is gone just as quickly as it comes, hidden away under his stotic expression with a quiet apology. Once more Molly's struck with a need to hold him close and keep him safe.  She'll have to settle for offering hot chocolate and fresh scones. There should be some leftovers from dinner still in the fridge she can offer too. 

"I'll have to stitch it up."  Molly says once she's finished cleaning the wound.  It's clearly been hexed against healing, he's lucky the hex didn't cause an infection.   He doesn't seem all that surprised about it though, simply nodding. "I can charm the thread against scarring and make the needle as painless as possible, but I can't promise it won't hurt at all."  She warns. People react differently to pain spells. Of course she can send him to sleep, but she doesn't think he'll be comfortable with that.

"That's fine."  He says. "But… but don't charm the thread."  He adds, a little more hesitantly.

"If I don't charm the thread it  _ will  _ scar."  Molly frowns, looking up from her needle and thread.

"I know."  He says. There's more to it, but Molly can guess what.  The Nameless Twat had done this much damage for an accident, and had it hexed against healing.  It wasn't that much of a leap to say he'd be mad to see the punishment fully faded. 

"Alright."  Molly accepts.  She charms the needle, but not the thread, and begins to stitch the wound up with a precision taught by war.  The spy winces a few times but mostly remains silent. When it's finally over, she bandages it up and smiles. "There, as good as it'll great."

"Thank you."  The spy's quiet words make her smile wider.

"Of course dear."  She says. "Now you sit right there and I'll fix you up something to eat."

"No, I should go."  He refuses, even as she hears his stomach growl.  "I already stayed too long."

"None of that now."  Molly scolds gently. "You're the reason I was stress baking those scones, it's only right you help me eat them."  She teases.

"Dumbledore is mad enough that I brought these to you."  The spy shakes his head. "Nevermind what will happen if someone notices I'm missing."

"The burrow is charmed every way to Sunday, no one will notice you're here."  She assures. "As for Dumbledore, well, what he doesn't know won't hurt him."

"You wouldn't tell him?"  He asks, frowning. Clearly he's as used to the blind faith as she is.  Or perhaps that's why Dumbledore has kept him so far from the Order, to ensure he thinks them all loyal to Dumbledore first and the mission second.

"Of course not."  She assures. "But if I'm keeping this a secret, you'll have to tell me something."

"What?"  The spy asks, guard immediately back up.

"What's your name dear?  I can't refer to you only as 'the spy'."  She hums, trying not to chuckle at his surprise.

"Severus."  He says after a moment of hesitation.  "I'll stay for food.  But you have to send the bag first.  It really is important. They found an orphanage that caters to squips and muggleborn orphans that display accidental magic.  The Order has to get there first."  He explains.

"I'll send it now."  Molly assures, tone serious.  "And I'll make sure we do something to help."  Severus only really relaxes then, shoulders slumping in a calm that he doesn't seem very used to.  

"Thank you." Severus says.

"Of course dear.  Now, you just sit right there and I'll be back."  She's quick to send her owl with its precious cargo towards Dumbledore's office, and even quicker to whip up some cream and jam for the scones.  Still, she's half expecting Severus to have left since. It's a pleasant surprise to see him still sitting there as she brings in the scones, hot chocolate magically preparing itself on the kitchen stove.

"Here you are.  Hot chocolate shouldn't be much longer."  Molly says, placing the plate down. "You really ort to be eating more dear, you're practically a skeleton under all those robes."  

"As you could surely tell while stitching me up, I do have some muscle on me."  He claims, tone not rude as he digs into the scones. She thinks he tries to hold back, but it doesn't last long.

"Hardly enough for a growing boy."  Molly shakes her head.

"I'm not a boy."  Severus scrowls.

"You can't be out of your teens."  Molly argues. His lack of response and the way his ears turn red is all the affirmation she needs.  Oh if she ever gets the chance she is sending Dumbledore to the deepest, darkest corner of Azkaban to rot.

"I'm almost twenty."  He finally mumbles. "Besides, I've always been this skinny.  My potions have always mattered more than remembering meals." He defends.

"Potions?"  Molly prompts, rather than further scolding his meal intake.  There'll be time for that later, for now she wants to get to know him.  More importantly, she wants him to trust her. 

Gentle prodding gets Severus to open up a great deal about his love for potions, and his skill for it.  He doesn't speak a word of friends or family, but they chat herbs and methods. It's not Molly's expertise, but she knows enough to keep up.

The conversation continues until the warm drink and full stomach lulls Severus to sleep, though Molly can't discredit the blood loss and bags under his eyes.  Smiling, she gently levitates him into the spare bedroom on the bottom floor. Molly leaves a note for when he wakes, makes sure to charm the door against unwanted visitors, and heads up to bed herself.  

"Molly is that you dear?"  Arthur mumbles as she gets under the covers.  "What are you doing up?" He adds, still mostly asleep.

"Nothing Arthur."  Molly says. "Go back to sleep."  She wants to bring Severus into her family, for him to trust that all the Weasley's have his back.  But if he never does, she'll take his secret to the grave. Even from her husband.

 

The next morning she finds the spare bedroom empty, her note still on the bedside table.  She's not surprised, but she hopes he read it.

When Severus shows up on her door a week later, nursing a dislocated shoulder, she knows he did.  Now she just has to work on getting him to visit when he  _ isn't _ injured.


	3. James

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once more I'm two chapters ahead so just causally posts again.
> 
> Also I'm really happy with how I wrote James and Lily's relationship in this, i think they ended up super cute and I love them.
> 
> Double also - Thanks to everyone for the comments!! It makes my day to see you're enjoying what I write and the way I write these characters. So thank you so much, and I'm so sorry I don't reply to individual comments, i need to start doing that I just usually forget.

Breakfast at the Weasley's has been a tradition for as long as James can remember.  Depending on how chaotic life is, it ranges from once a week to once a month. With the chaos of war, it's certainly been of the once a month variety lately, but he tries.  According to Molly, that's the important part, not the fact he's missed more breakfasts than he's attended this year.

It's with this in mind that he says those fateful words one Tuesday morning.  

"Let's go to the Weasley's."

Breakfast is normally a Sunday affair, but he knows Molly and Arthur won't mind.  Remus, Sirius, and Peter are all off doing Order things, he thinks, so he can't drag them along like he usually would.  But he and Lily are at home, and he can't remember the last time he saw Molly and Arthur outside of Order work. Today seems like a perfect day for breakfast.

"Alright."  Lily agrees, though she immediately follows this by getting out of bed and robbing him of her warmth. 

"I didn't mean right now."  James whines, pouting when she laughs.

"No time like the present husband dear." She hums, digging through her closet for something to wear.

"That's cheating."  James tries to complain, but he can't help but grin.  They might've been married almost a year ago, but their marriage is still fresh on his heart.  It always will be, James thinks, and Lily knows this. Which means she uses it against him every chance she gets.

"Get dressed into something decent will you."  Lily instructs when he drags himself out of bed, already half dressed herself.  "I'm going to put the kettle on."

"Yes dear."  James hums, catching her for a kiss before she can leave the room.  Lily's nose crinkles as they part.

"Morning breath."  She complains. James laughs and lets her go, turning to the closet.  

 

“Lily!”  Arthur greets as he opens the door for them, smiling.  “Just the woman I wanted to see. I found the most peculiar muggle item the other day.  I was hoping you’d be able to help me figure it out.”

“Why is Arthur only ever happy to see you?”  James sighs dramatically. 

“Who’s at the door Arthur?”  They hear Molly calling from inside, likely putting together the very breakfast they’ve come to join.

“Nobody!”  James calls back.

“I’m sure if nothing comes up we can have a look at what you found after breakfast.”  Lily promises Arthur as they’re welcomed inside. 

“Wonderful.”  Arthur grins. “Molly has me keeping it in the garage, she’s worried it might be dangerous.”

“I’m rather more worried about it’s legality.”  Molly huffs, coming into view. She’s definitely been in the kitchen, her apron’s wrapped loosely around her baby bump.  “Good morning dears, we weren’t expecting you until Sunday.”

“We’ll still be coming Sunday if we can.”  James assures. “But we woke up this morning and realized we were free, so we thought we’d stop by.”

“Yes, it’s rather like that these days isn’t it.”  Molly sighs. “Having to take every moment you can.”

“And all the free food you can.”  James jokes to lighten the mood, happily accepting Molly’s kiss on the cheek and smack across the back of the head. 

“Ignore him.  Did you happen to have room for two more?”  Lily asks. 

“Always dear.”  Molly smiles.

“Oh!  Can I make the extra chair mum?”  Bill asks, already excitedly reaching for Molly’s wand.  It seems their kid-free moment had passed, James thinks that’s actually a new record.

“We won’t be needing an extra chair Bill.”  Molly sighs. “But you can set the extra seats.  Arthur would you go get Percy?”

“Percy’s taken quite the liking to thick texts, he gets lost of them.  Probably literally too, I can’t imagine a three year old can understand all that jargon.”  Arthur tells them as he heads upstairs. 

“But there’s only two extra seats!”  Bill argues. “We have to make one or S won’t have anywhere to sit!”

“Whose S?”  James asks. “Is one of the boys going through the imaginary friend phase?”  

“He’s not imaginary!”  Bill huffs. “He’s real, and he’s sleeping right in there.”  He points over to the spare room on the first floor. 

“I can’t imagine anyone sleeping through a Weasley breakfast.”  Lily says. 

“Well not everyone is as sleep deprived as him.”  Molly sighs, mostly under her breath. “Which is exactly why we aren’t waking him up for breakfast.”  She tells Bill.

“Are we waking up S?”  Charlie asks, clearly having very selective hearing on what his mother just said.  

“No.”  Molly says firmly.

“Aw, but mum he promised me stories about dragons!”  Charlie whines.

“Are we getting upstaged as the favourite babysitters?”  James asks Lily as he watches the children practically beg to wake up the mysterious S.  “I think we’re getting upstaged as the favourite babysitters.”

“Oh don’t you worry, you’re still my favourite babysitters.”  Molly assures. “Just ignore them, S doesn’t get to visit very often and they get rather excited.”

“I can see that.”  James chuckles.

“Go ahead and take your seats, I’ll start dishing out in a minute.”  Molly instructs as Arthur leads a pouting Percy down the stairs, holding up the twins with both his arms and likely a bit of magic.  “Arthur!” Molly scolds.

“They’re perfectly safe.”  Arthur assures.

“Would you like a hand dishing up?”  Lily offers.

“Nonsense, take a seat.”  Molly brushes her off.

“So, I have to ask.”  James calls once he’s sitting in the chair.  “Who is this S? I thought I knew everyone you did.”  It was hard not to know everyone, or at least have heard everyone’s name, these days.  

“He’s a rather private fellow.”  Arthur says. “You’ve probably never met.”

“Does he have a full name?”  James asks.

“Yep!”  Charlie grins.  “But mum says we’re not allowed to say it.”

“Oh?”  James raises an eyebrow, looking from Charlie to Molly.  She clearly didn’t want him to know that, her usual smile having turned to a tight frown.  Who exactly are they hiding in that guest room?

“Now Charlie, you’re not allowed to tell people that.”  Molly scolds. “He simply doesn’t want to get involved in all this war business, so he’s asked we don’t tell people his name.”  She tells James.

“It’s amazing how much tracking you can do with name spells these days.”  Arthur adds. James doesn’t buy it for a second, but he does get the point.  Stop asking.

“Geez, I’d almost think you guys have Dumbledore’s spy in your guest room.”  He jokes, intending to use the ridiculous guess be the conversation ender. And it does end the conversation, but not because they laugh and move on.  

It ends the conversation because Arthur and Molly freeze.

“I was kidding.”  James says. “Oh my god, do you have  _ the _ spy in your spare bedroom?”

“Why’s he here?”  Lily asks, face clouded with concern rather than shock.  Which really just made James more shocked. “Is he okay?”

“He’s fine.”  Molly assures.  “He was simply dropping off information last night and spent the night.”

“That’s not like him at all.”  Lily claims, chair sliding against the floor as she stands.

“Wait, you know who the spy is?”  James calls after her. Does everyone know who Dumbledore's mysterious spy is? And why hadn't Lily told him she knew?

"Lily, wait!"  Molly tries. She might've reached for her wand, but both her hands were holding a large plate of eggs.  Arthur is simply too slow to react, barely turning in time to see Lily burst into the guest room.

It's rather anticlimactic for James.  Lily stands in the doorway, blocking any view he might've had to the room.  She and the guest are silent too, giving no verbal hints as to who exactly is inside. 

"Oh dear."  Molly sighs, placing the eggs down.  The boys sense none of the tension in the room, all but Percy jumping out of their seats to join Lily.  James gets the distinct impression he shouldn't follow their led and go find out the super-secret identity of the spy.  His curiosity wins out over his sense of social expectations however, and he stands to follow.

"Lily?"  He's almost at the door when he hears an oddly familiar voice calling his wife's names.  Their voice is thick with sleep, meaning they probably had slept through the chaos of a Weasley breakfast.  Or Molly had charmed the rooms soundproof, that was much more likely.

"You're up!"  Bill cheers. The boys all rush forward and James finally gets his first sight of the spy.  It takes a minute to recognize the mess of pale skin and black hair under the redheads jumping on top of him, but when the face clicks James eyes practically bulge out of his head.

"Snape?!"  He exclaims, looking from the suddenly tense man to his shocked wife.  "Snape's the spy?!" It didn't seem possible. 

"I need to leave."  Snape says, tone as cold as James remembers.

"None of that now dear."  Molly scolds, pushing past Lily and James.  "You haven't even had breakfast."

"I've already been here too long."  Snape argues.

"No such thing."  Molly tsked. "I'm not letting you leave until you've had seconds.  Now all of you, back to the breakfast table."

"You can't leave yet!"  Charlie agrees. "You said you were going to tell me about the dragon you fought!"

"Stay! Stay!"  The twins cheer from beside the bed, too small to properly jump onto it. This wins, James thinks, this is the weirdest thing he's ever seen.  

"You definitely can't leave before you tell me why you're visiting Molly and not me."  Lily says, shock fading away into that expression she gets when she's not really mad but wants you to think she's mad.  "I've been worried sick Sev."

"I'd just to like to know how this happened."  James adds. "I mean, you're Severus Snape! Who'd have guessed you'd become the spy?!" 

"Of course he'd become the spy."  Lily scolds. "You think he'd join them because he wanted to?"

"Yes?"  James answers, even though he's pretty sure that's not the answer Lily wants.

"People thinking I wanted to join them is the entire reason I am the spy Lily."  Snape points out. James isn't sure how to feel about the fact Snape is on his side about this.  He isn't sure what to feel about the fact Snape is on his side period. And to think he's always been on his side?  James knows he did a lot of wrong at Hogwarts, especially when it came to Snape. He never thought mocking the boy for becoming a deatheater would be one of those wrongs.  Had Lily known the whole time? Of course she had, no wonder she shut him and Padfoot down when they talked about Snape.

God, James thinks with a shake of his head, who'd have thought breakfast at the Weasley's would lead to the complete reevaluation of everything he thought he knew.

"Are you even listening?"  Lily huffs, drawing James out of his thoughts.

"What's that dear?  I'm trying to figure out if I woke up in a different reality."

"Not funny."  Lily scolds. "We were saying that you can't tell anyone."

"Of course not."  James agrees. He'd never risk the Order and their intel that way.

"Not even Dumbledore."  Lily presses.

"You especially can't tell Dumbledore that you know."  Molly seconds.  James doesn't really get that, but he's not about to argue with either of them.

"I'll take it to my grave, I swear."  He says, drawing a cross over his heart to emphasise the point.  

"I'm so assured."  Snape mutters under his breath.

"I trust him."  Lily says. "And if he's lying, he'll find himself very single."  She threatens.

"Well I was lying before but now…"  James trails off, smirking at Lily. "I'm kidding."  He adds when Snape doesn't realize his joke, raising his hands in surrender.  "I wouldn't do that to you." 

"Alright, time for breakfast."  Molly repeats, starting to herd the boys back out.  "Before your father eats everything."

"I haven't touched a thing."  Arthur claims, his mouth sounding suspiciously not empty.  

"And now that this is sorted, you best be joining us Severus."  Molly instructs.

"As stubborn as ever."  Snape sighs, but he pulls himself out of the bed.  

"I didn't strike you as a cute ghosts kind of man."  James says, commenting on the pyjama pants Snape is wearing because all of this is weird and barely believable but he might as well go along with it.  The pyjama pants in question are black with adorable little ghosts printed on them. 

"Blame your wife."  Snape huffs, clearly trying to pretend he wasn't flushing.

"I knew you'd like them."  Lily grins. 

"You know I thought they looked like the deer pyjamas you bought me."  James hums. 

"I am never wearing these again."  Snape decides.

"That's fine, I'll just buy you something new.  You can pick it up when you visit." Lily says.

"Lily…"  Snape starts.  It seems like a conversation they've had before, though James can't think of when.  He supposes there's a lot his wife hasn't told him.  Back at Hogwarts that would have sparked his jealousy something fierce, but now he can't bring himself to mind.  She clearly had her reasons, and he's just happy to see her so happy.  Even if she's happy because of Snape.

"James knows now, so there's no excuse."  Lily says. "And you can't tell me it's too dangerous, you're clearly visiting Molly often enough."

"I think it's a good idea."  James says. "It's about time I got to know my wife's best friend, especially now I know that best friend isn't actually a deatheater."  Snape grumbles at him. He'd probably been hoping James would object. Jokes on him, only fools argue with Lily and James is no fool.

Besides, he wasn't kidding.  He really does want to get to know Snape, to maybe even make up for how he was at Hogwarts.

"Then it's settled, you're stopping by for dinner tomorrow night."  Lily grins.

"Fine."  Snape gives in.  "I'll try." Lily must believe him, because she leaves for breakfast without further demands.  James almost moves to follow her, then stops.

"You know, I'm glad you're on our side."  He tells Snape, whose turned to find a shirt.

"Oh really?"  Snape rolls his eyes, clearly not paying it.

"Really."  James says.  "You meant, well mean, a lot to Lily.  It took me a while to accept that, and I'm sorry about that.  I'm glad we've got a chance to start over."  He admits.  Snape hesitates in his search and James turns to leave, his olive branch given.

"She asked for my blessing you know."  Snape says before James can take a step.  "Before you started dating."

"She did?"  James prompts when he doesn't think Snape is going to continue.

"I told her I was fine with it.  It was obvious you cared about her, and obvious you'd learnt to be less of a git."  There's more to it than that, James realizes, a meaning Snape doesn't verbalize.  He knows James means a lot to Lily, and he's okay with that.  

Snape's accepting the olive branch.  Maybe they really can start over.

"Hurry up you two!"  Lily calls.

"I want to hear about the dragons!"  Charlie's own cheer immediately follows.

"We're coming."  They say at once, which makes James chuckle and Snape scowl.  They join the table on either side of Lily.

"Mum wouldn't let me make the chair."  Bill pouts at James. "Mine would've been way better."

"You can conjure the next chair."  James promises.

"At your house perhaps."  Molly shuts that down fast, shooting them both a warning gaze.  James chuckles and settles into the chaos of a Weasley breakfast, joining into any of the dozen conversations whenever his mouth isn't full.

Maybe Tuesday mornings should be the new weekly day.


	4. Remus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...   
> this was going to be a cute thing were Remus was invited over to the Potter's and met Severus there and was just utterly unsurprised by everything but super supportive
> 
> And then I realized that I'd be able to present a lot more information if I made it sad. And now it's sad.
> 
> Whoops?

The funeral is larger than Remus thinks it should be.  It's also rather more celebratory than he thinks it has right to be.  Too many people have invited themselves, intent to spend a day of remembrance celebrating a war won.  Whose bright idea was it too announce the funerals time and location? Whose bright idea was it to allow the masses in to join?  

Whose bright idea was it to have the funeral so close to the full moon?

“Are you alright?”  Molly asks gently as the ceremony proper, if it can even be called that, comes to an end.  

“I can’t even stand by their graves.”  Remus mutters, holding his hands tightly and wishing that would stop shaking.  Apparently, strangers had been camped out the night before. He hadn’t been able to get close, and he hadn’t really wanted to.  Not with all the reporters getting statements for everyone in reach. Remus was only lucky that Molly had spotted him, so he wouldn’t be alone in the mass of people who  _ shouldn’t be there _ .  

He understands they were heroes.  That their sacrifice had led to the defeat of You Know Who but god dammit they were his friends.  And in the span of one night he lost them all to a man he thought he loved, once upon a time. Could they not just let him mourn?

“We’ll come back.”  Arthur suggests. “When the vultures have cleared.”

“Just the few of us that really miss them.”  Molly agrees. Remus nods but doesn’t answer.  It had taken so much energy to drag himself here, he’s not sure he’ll be able to do it again.

“Perhaps we should leave.”  Molly says. “Any sympathies we get wouldn’t be sincere anyway.”

“Yeah.”  Remus manages to talk this time.  Together they turn away from the graves, the only few seeming to do so, but then Remus stops.

“Everything alright dear?”  Molly asks as Remus’ attention turns to the trees.  He doesn’t often think of it, but there are  _ some _ benefits to the wolf.  A heightened sense of smell is one of those few.  

“Go ahead without me.”  Remus says. “There’s someone I have to talk to.”

“Alright.”  Molly says. “But just remember our door is always open.”

“We’ll send you an owl to keep in touch.”  Arthur adds.

“Thank you.”  Remus accepts, even forcing a small smile, and then he starts to push his way through the crowd and towards the woods.  He finds the figure standing just far enough in the shadows that he can’t be seen, at least not by anyone whose not looking for him, and though Remus’ footsteps are quiet the man still looks up.

“Are you here to tell me to leave?  That I have no right to miss them?” Severus asks.  He sounds as broken as Remus feels.

“You have every right to be here Sev.”  Remus says, shaking his head. 

“Don’t call me that.”  Severus says, flinching.  “They called me that.” He mumbles in way of explanation.  Remus gets it, if no one ever calls him Moony again it’ll be too soon.  “No one can know I was here.” 

“I know.”  Remus says.  Severus had been rounded up with the rest of the deatheaters when You Know Who was defeated but he hadn’t found his way to Azbakan the way most did.  ‘ _ Insufficient evidence to prove his involvement willing _ ’ had been the official statement.  Remus knew better. Before the war had even ended, Dumbledore had been warning it would return.  For that reason, he would never truly disband the Order. 

For that reason, he would never reveal his spy.

“You know?”  Severus repeats, eyeing him hesitantly.

“It doesn’t take a genius to figure out why there’s still wolfsbane potion at my door once a month.”  Remus points out. Severus bristles, though the panic can’t full erase the grief in his expression. “It’s hard to forget a potion we spent months perfecting.  But I’ve kept my promise, I’ll keep it to my grave. Even they didn’t know.” Severus accepts that, turning back to the botched funeral.

“They knew.”  He eventually says, voice barely a whisper.  “About everything.”

“Both of them?”  Remus asks, attemptedly a bit surprised.  He’d expected Lily to know, they’d even almost talked about it once or twice, but it was a shock to hear James had.

“He found out by accident.”  Severus says, and for a moment a ghost of smile reaches his mouth.  “I was at the Burrow when they stopped by. Lily burst into my room the moment she realized I was there.  Of course James couldn’t respect someone’s privacy.” He’s teasing, Remus realizes, not mocking. 

“His curiosity usually got the better of him.  I thought she’d help him be a little less impulsive.”  Remus remembers. 

“She was just as bad as he was.”  Severus says, managing a wet laugh.  “She just hid it better.”

“At least she was better at not getting caught.”  Remus says.

“She just had all the right friends.”  Severus claims. “Before she learnt to listen to the snakes, she was rather horrible at hiding.”

“She was a parseltongue?”  Remus asks, surprised. She’d never brought that up before.  Then again, it wasn’t a skill with the best of reputations. 

“We both are.  We used to pass secret messages back and forth through snakes.”  Severus admits after a moment. He’s not usually this open, or at least he wasn’t back when they were kids.  Remus remembers having to pry information out of him. Maybe he’s changed. Or maybe those graves have him feeling too tightly bottled, desperate to share as much as he can in hopes he doesn’t break apart.  Certainly that’s how Remus feels.

“I’m sure that left James feeling rather left out.”  Remus says, rather than getting caught in what he hadn’t known.  He can almost see James pouting in the kitchen as Lily gossips with a garden snake, or Lily stubbornly refusing to speak in anything but parseltongue because James had upset her.

“He demanded we try to teach him once.”  Severus says. Remus can see that too, James determined face even though he  _ knows _ it’s impossible. 

“I’m not surprised.”  Remus says, managing a chuckle.  They’re quiet again a moment, until Remus finds it all too suffocating and has to speak again.  “I’m glad you three got to be friends. It must’ve meant the world to Lily to see you two finally getting along.”  Severus is quiet again, curling in on himself a little as he starts to shake. 

“We did more than get along.”  Severus admits. “The three of us, I… I thought I’d moved on but I hadn’t and James…”  He cuts himself off with a sob. “They, and I, I loved them more than anything. Warning them, the secret keeper, keeping an ear out, I thought, I thought it’d be enough but I had no idea, I couldn’t protect them.”  His sentences fragment before becoming entirely sobs as Severus falls apart. Remus forces himself through the shock once more, catching Severus as he falls to the ground and holding him. He doesn’t know what to say so he says nothing.  

“I told him.”  Severus whispers against Remus’ chest.  “Dumbledore assured me it meant nothing, that it wasn’t a real prophecy.  When I realized he was going to act on it I thought I was lucky for finding out so early.  I had time to warn them, to keep them safe.” Remus’ grip tightens some as the knowledge sinks in.  If not for Dumbledore’s instructions, his friends would never have been in danger. Severus clearly hadn’t known the weight of those words, but had Dumbledore?  Remus can’t be sure.

“It wasn’t your fault.”  Remus says. “You didn’t know.”

“I should have.”  Severus argues. “A spy without knowledge is useless.”  He spits. “I should have known what he’d do. I should have known about his spy.”

“You couldn’t know everything.”  Remus says. “If you want someone to blame, blame Sirius.  He’s the one who betrayed them.” He adds, an almost wolf-like growl to his tone.  

“No.”  Severus says.  “It wasn’t Sirius.”

“What?”  Remus frowns.

“Peter.  God.” Severus chokes on his words but he forces himself to continue anyway.  “Sirius thought no one would suspect Peter. They changed secret keepers.”

“Then… Sirius wasn’t the one who betrayed them?”  Remus asks. For everything else that Severus has said, this is the one that truly shocks him, that makes him freeze.  Sirius  _ wasn’t  _ the secret keeper?  But why hadn’t they told Remus?  No, he knows why. Sirius was as suspicious of Remus as Remus was of Sirius.  

And Remus knows why he was so suspicious of Sirius in the first place.  

Conversations float back to him.  The little things Peter had said to make Remus doubt his best friend.  Unanswered questions and normal things Peter had painted suspicious.

Oh god.

“We have to tell someone.  Sirius is in Azkaban.” Remus says.

“I tried.”  Severus says.  “I told Dumbledore.  Not the whole truth, I said I heard it from the deatheaters.  But he won’t do anything. He says if he speaks up he’ll have to reveal he has a spy, which will ruin everything.”  He explains. “It was all I could do to convince him to have Peter’s grave somewhere else.”

“Dumbledore will have Sirius rot.”  It’s not a question, Remus believes it.  More rage builds in him as he realizes Dumbledore knew this and didn’t tell Remus, not even privately.

“I couldn’t protect James and Lily, and I can do nothing as Sirius takes the fall.”  Remus manages to make out through Severus’ sobs. “They were like brothers. James would hate me for this.”  

“He wouldn’t hate you.”  Remus assures. There’s nothing Severus can do and James would know that.  If he spoke out it’d be his word against Dumbledore’s. At best, Severus would end up in Azkaban himself.  At worst, the deatheaters would go after him. “You can’t tell everyone, but you told me. Thank you.” 

Remus woke up this morning thinking he’d lost all friends to a monster.  Now he knows the monster isn’t who he’d thought. His own tears finally start to fall.

 

When they’re eyes have long since dried themselves and the crowds have long since left, Remus forces himself to stand.  “Here.” He says, offering Severus his hand. Severus takes it wordlessly. “I think we could both do for a hot drink.” 

“I think you’re right.”  Severus agrees. Remus draws his wand and apperates them to his kitchen.  It’s not very glamorous, but it works. 

“I’m not sure how much tea I have left.”  Remus warns, starting to dig through his cupboard. 

“I can make us hot chocolate.”  Severus suggests, eyeing the stacks of chocolate.  

“You’re a guest, let me make it.”  Remus offers.

“It’s Molly’s recipe, much better than anything you know I’m sure.”  Severus brushes him off. 

“At least let me help.”  Remus says. Severus can only half remember the recipe, but what the end with is better than the original.  

“We can’t tell Molly.”  Remus decides as he takes the first sip.  “She’ll be heartbroken.”

“Obviously.”  Severus agrees.  They slip into a more comfortable silence until Remus finds his hot chocolate is gone and sighs.

“What do we do now?”  He asks. It’s a question he’s been pondering since the news came.  He’d made plans once, back when the war was new and not quite as real, but those had all included his friends.

“Dumbledore has asked me to teach potions at Hogwarts.”  Severus says, tone implying it wasn’t much of an asking. “I suppose I will do that.  You?”

“I don’t know.”  Remus admits. “There isn’t much work for werewolves these days.”  Not that there’s ever been much work for werewolves. They’re silent again.

“You could sell potions.”  Severus eventually offers.

“I can barely brew them.”  Remus points out.

“I meant,” Severus huffs, “you can sell  _ my _ potions.  There’s countless people that could use the wolfsbane.”

“I don’t feel right charging for that.  People that need it won’t be able to afford it.”  Remus shakes his head.

“Then have a pay what you can method.”  Severus offers. “And sell other things on the side.”

“You’ll be doing all the work, that’s unfair.”  Remus continues to protest.

“I’ll brew, you’ll sell.  You can send me back only the cost of ingredients.  Although you can probably get some of those as well.”  Severus decides. “Besides, I’ve always wanted to set up a potions shop.  This is the closest I can get.” He tries for nonchalant, but Remus can see Severus’ face fall back into grief.  Did he plan it out with James and Lily the way they thought of opening a joke shop? Remus sighs.

“I suppose we can make that work.”  He says. 

“Good.”  Severus nods, forcing the grief from his face.  He moves on to talking about the potions they’ll stock, and they brainstorm ways to market the new store.  When the topic runs dry they return to silence for a while.

“The Weasley’s and I were planning a small funeral.”  Remus breaks the silence again. “Just us really. You could join.”  He offers.

“I can’t.”  Severus refuses, making a face.  “I can’t risk someone seeing me and I… I need to take a step back from the Weasley’s.”

“Why?”  Remus asks.

“Somehow it’s even riskier now.”  Severus sighs. “I’ll be working at Hogwarts when they attend, and I can’t risk anyone noticing how well I know them.  Better to have the years of distance. And besides I… I never really considered what might happen to  _ them _ if I’m found out.  I can’t risk it. Not with the kids.”  Remus gets it, even as he knows it’s a terrible way to cope.  He’s pushed plenty of people away on the chance they might be hurt by the wolf, or by people who despise werewolves.

“I live alone.”  He points out. “I imagine I will for a while.” 

“Yes, I can see that.”  Severus frowns, not seeing the point.

“I’m also unlikely to be attending Hogwarts and am already directly familiar with the deatheaters methods of revenge.”  He says, gesturing to his scar.

“What is your point?”  Severus prompts, confused frown growing more annoyed.

“That there’s little to worry about with me.”  Remus says. “And you can visit any time you’d like.”

“Oh.”  Severus mumbles.  “Well, I’ll certainly keep that in mind.  I suppose.” Remus nods but doesn’t smile.  He doesn’t have the energy for even a forced smile right now, but then neither does Severus.  Without a word, he stands and makes them both another round of hot chocolate. This time Remus breaks the silence with stories of James and Lily, things he remembers and things he’ll miss.  Severus chimes in with his own. It hurts. But with each story, it hurts a little less.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no regrets  
> One day I'll write thats actually fluffy for this pairing. Until then you have this, and that other really sad thing last night.


	5. Draco

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, I've started back up at uni, so updates will actually be going to once a week because I don't trust I can get them out faster than that.  
> I've also got another project I'm working on at the moment which takes priority over this one sorry - Street Rat and The Beast - which is another of my Misplaced Fairytales. You can read the first of them -[Peter Pan|Robin Hood](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15574983)\- on my ao3.
> 
> Also woohoo we have some crossover with Big Brothers of Slytherin!

“ _ This is going to take forever to clean up.” _  Draco complains as he scrubs at Tiffany’s scales.  Behind him various spells work to clean up the bones and dust that’s collected in the who knows how long since someone was looking after the chamber.   _ “How could someone let this happen?” _

_ “People don’t like to remember the complexity of the past.” _  Tiffany says, much more content in the mess than Draco.  Then again, she’d had to live with it for centuries.  _ “It is easier to paint Salazar as a paranoid and evil man, and forget any good he did for Hogwarts.  Much as it is easier to paint Helga as a harmless soul and not the terrifying warrior she could be.” _

_ “But still, you’d think at least some of the headmasters cleaned this up.  Or the parseltongues that came through.”  _ Draco huffs.

_ “The last parseltongues to attend Hogwarts never knew of me.” _  Tiffany says.   _ “I was sleeping throughout their schooling, if not for the other snakes I’d never know they’d been here.  Before them it was Riddle, and he had no interest in my wellbeing.” _

_ “Riddle was an asshole.” _  Draco huffs.  It’d been rather easy to go from ‘holy shit I just destroyed a memory of the dark lord I am so double dead’ to ‘holy shit the dark lord is a slob’ once Draco really started cleaning up the chamber.  Anyone who could leave a beauty such as Tiffany living in such filth didn’t deserve his fear. Nevermind the countless reasons he didn’t deserve Draco’s respect. 

“So this is where you’ve been sneaking off to.”  Terror shoots through Draco at the very human-sounding voice that rings through the chamber.  He turns quickly, dropping the sponge he’d been using on Tiffany and raising his wand to the intruder.  As Severus steps into the wizard lights, Draco first instinct is relax. His mind catches up before he can.  None of the teachers claimed to know the chamber's entrance as Riddle’s memory run amuck of the school, he shouldn’t be able to be here.  But of course, Severus is a deatheater. Why would he reveal the entrance when he supported what was happening?

Draco drops his wand arm, but he remains tense and prepared.  Severus finding him here isn’t good for his life expectancy.

“Uncle Sev.”  He greets, frowning in a way he hopes looks more confused than nervous.  “What are you doing down here?” How did you get here, he doesn’t ask even though he’s burning to know.

“Looking for you.”  Severus says, walking closer.

“Why?”  Draco asks, hoping beyond hope that Severus doesn’t know.  That he’s not here to kill Draco for daring to betray the Dark Lord.  

“You helped stopped the heir of Slytherin.”  Severus states. It’s not a question and Draco has no defence.  He gulps, feeling Tiffany stir behind him as she senses his discomfort.  Maybe if he asks nicely she’ll keep her eyes closed, even after he’s killed.  Maybe if he’s lucky Severus will make it quick.

“What the deatheaters want is wrong.”  He says as firmly as he can. “I couldn’t just stand there and let it happen.”

“You’re absolutely right.”  Draco almost drops his wand at Severus’ agreement, so surprised to hear it.  

“What?”  He frowns.  Was Severus trying to trick him?  Get his guard down so he’ll be too slow to defend himself?  That didn’t seem like Severus. But then, Draco is waiting for his godfather to kill him, so maybe it shouldn’t be so surprising.

“You understand you’ll have to be incredibly careful, don’t you?  If the deatheaters find out they won’t have mercy.” Severus warns.

“You mean… you’re not going to turn me in?”  Draco asks. Severus frowns, stopping just out of arm’s reach of Draco.

“Turn you… of course I’m not going to turn you in!”  Severus says, not a hint of a lie on his face. 

“You’re not?”  Draco repeats, relief and disbelief flooding his system all at once.  It feels like that afternoon in the Room of Requirement just a few days ago, when Fred and George promised to protect him.

“Draco, you’re my godson.  I’d never let anything happen to you.”  Severus assures. Draco covers the distance between them, wrapping his arms tight around Severus’ waist and trying his damnedest not to start crying again.  Severus sighs, returning the hug. “Did you really think I would turn you over?” He asks softly.

“I didn’t want to.”  Draco says. “But…” But his father would, but he had to expect the worst, but he’s terrified and feeling hopelessly alone.  He doesn’t want to finish the sentence out loud. With another sigh, Severus holds him tighter.

“I understand.”  He says. “But I assure you I couldn’t be happier you turned against the deatheaters.  Although, I am mad you did something so dangerous.” He says, not giving Draco time to mull over that first part.

_ “I would say he did something brave. _ ”  Tiffany says, voice practically a purr.

“It was reckless.”  Severus says, almost as though he can understand her.   He pulls away enough to look Draco in the eye and so Draco can probably take in his ‘you are an idiot and I was so worried’ expression.

“I had my eyes closes.”  Draco defends.

“Draco you were facing a fifty-foot serpent who was under the control of the dark lord himself.  Closing your eyes would not have done much to protect you.” Severus points out. “She could have easily killed you in other ways.”

_ “You were rather lucky you are easy to listen to.” _  Tiffany agrees.

_ “Whose side are you on here?” _  Draco mutters.  “It worked out fine.”  He adds. Running a hand over his face in exasperation, Severus mutters something Draco can’t quite make out.

“Next time you do something reckless and dangerous, tell me first.  Or better yet, just don’t do it.” He orders.

“I’m sorry for worrying you.”  Draco says, purposefully promising nothing.  Severus no doubt notices, but he doesn’t call Draco out on it.  Likely because he knows it’s a promise Draco won’t keep.

“I’m glad you’re okay, even if you  _ are  _ giving me grey hairs.”  Severus sighs. “And I’m glad it worked out.”

_ “As am I.” _  Tiffany says, curling a little more around them.

“I’m just glad you don’t hate me.  But… I don’t get it.” Draco admits.  Severus isn’t acting like he’s suddenly turned against the deatheaters for him, but Draco can’t imagine anything else is going here.  As far as he knows, Severus is a deatheater through and through. It was Severus’ information that led to the Potter’s death, which means it was also his information that led to the Dark Lord’s defeat.  Yet he still stands in the deatheaters inner circle, a testament to how trusted his loyalty is. How can Severus be standing there  _ glad _ that Draco’s turned his back on the deatheaters?

“I’m sure I don’t need to tell you how important it is you keep this to yourself,” Severus starts.  He hesitates another moment before nodding to himself. “I joined the deatheaters for the sole purpose of spying on them.”

“What?”  Draco balks at the idea.  Severus a spy? Impossible.  No one had even suggested there  _ was _ a spy among the deatheaters, let alone that Severus could be that spy.  “I don’t believe it.” 

“I suppose that speaks for how good I am.”  Severus says.

“If you’re a spy, why didn’t you stop the heir?”  Draco asks, suspicious. “Clearly you know about the entrance.”

“I couldn’t tell anyone because I didn’t know about the entrance.”  Severus claims. He moves to continue but Draco cuts him off.

“You’re standing in the Chamber of Secrets right now!”

“If you’ll let me finish.”  Severus says pointedly, wanting a moment to ensure Draco won’t butt in again.  “I didn’t know about the entrance, until Eris told me to it today.”

“Eris?  My snake?”  Draco confirms, frowning.  “But you’re not a parseltongue.”  

_ “Now who told you that?”   _ Severus asks, a smirking tilt to his lips.  As Draco stares, he turns to Tiffany.  _ “A pleasure to meet you Miss Basilisk.  I’m sorry I couldn’t help you as Draco did.” _

_ “Call me Tiffany.” _  She chuckles, bumping against Draco’s side.   _ “This is one of the parseltongues I was speaking of earlier.  I didn’t realize you knew him.” _

_ “In his defence, I was careful to hide it.” _  Severus hums.

_ “Why?!” _  Draco finally finds his voice.  “Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you teach me?”  He remembers when he learnt he was a parseltongue - the days he couldn’t seem to control it and the way his father was so obsessed with everyone knowing how alike his son was to the Dark Lord.  Draco could have used a godfather who understood then.

“I couldn’t risk the deatheaters knowing.”  Severus explains. “That’s more attention than I could risk.  Especially now.” Okay, Draco can understand that. It would not go over well for Severus to suddenly reveal his parseltongue ability, it would certainly cause some suspicion.  

“Is there anything else you’re hiding?”  Draco asks, trying to let go of the anger.

“Plenty.”  Severus admits.

“Well?  Are you going to tell me?”  Draco prompts when Severus doesn’t continue.

“Perhaps one day.”  Severus says. “Is there anything else you’re hiding?  Other than your new friendship with a basilisk of all snakes, that is.”

“Plenty.”  Draco says, because he wants to be petty.  Severus just gives him The Look. The ‘are you really going to try that on me’ look that he and Draco’s mother have mastered.  With an annoyed sigh, Draco continues. “Harry knows, and Millicent, and the twins. About me being a bloodtraitor. And about you being my godfather.”  He doesn’t mention Ginny. According to Harry and the twins she’d suppressed most of what had happened that night, including Draco’s involvement, so he doesn’t think she counts.

“You aren’t a bloodtraitor, you just have a moral compass.  That’s the opposite of a bad thing.” Severus says. “Do they know how important it is to keep it a secret?”

“They do.”  He nods.

“Good.  Because it cannot be overstated.”  

“I know.”

“If your father or anyone else finds out, they  _ will  _ kill you.”  Severus continues.  The words make Draco tense, but not from surprise.  He’s well aware of what will happen to him should the wrong people discover the truth.

“I know.”  He mumbles. 

“If you start to even suspect they know, you need to leave immediately.”  He says. “Go immediately to the Weasley’s, tell Molly that I sent you.”

“The Weasleys?”  Draco frowns. Fred and George he knows, and Fred and George he trusts.  But he’s not sure about the other Weasleys, he certainly doesn’t know any of them well.  He hadn’t thought Severus knew them well either.

“They’ll look after you.”  Severus assures. “Molly certainly took care of me whenever I needed it.”  

“She did?”  Draco asks. “So she knows?  About you?”

“Yes.  As does Arthur.  Bill and Charlie likely remember me as well, they were older than the others when I cut off ties with the family.”  Severus explains. 

“How am I supposed to trust someone you cut ties with?”  Draco frowns.

“I cut ties with them because it became too dangerous to interact with them.  That’s not their fault, and Molly understood.” Severus shakes his head. “Now, are you done being suspicious?  Will you promise me you’ll go to the burrow should anything happen?” He asks. Draco chews the inside of his cheek for a moment.  He really doesn’t know the Weasleys, and he doesn’t know how he feels about them being his backup. But he does trust Fred and George to look out for him, and he trusts Severus.

“Alright.”  He agrees. “I promise.”

“Thank you.”  Severus says. “Now, I believe I interrupted Tiffany’s bath.  Shall we?” 

_ “Yes, please do.” _  Tiffany encourages.  Draco picks his sponge backup while Severus restarts the cleaning spells before joining him.  They catch up like they usually do when they get a moment to themselves, but this time their conversations are half in parseltongue and Draco talks of his new, not-deatheater-friendly friends.  It’s nice, in a familiar way the Room of Requirement isn’t yet. 

They finally start to pack up and bid Tiffany their farewells when it gets to near dinner for their absence to remain unnoticed.  As they approach the chamber's entrance, one that’s closer to the Slytherin dorms than the bathroom, Draco speaks up.

“I meet the others in the Room of Requirement most days.”  He says, even though he’s already told Severus that. That’s not the part he’s been debating bringing up all afternoon.  “You could meet us there, if you wanted.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”  Severus says, though he doesn’t look happy to say it.  

“Oh.”  Draco mumbles.

“However,” Severus adds, “I don’t think it’s a bad idea for them to know.”  

“Really?”  Draco asks, perking up at the thought that he won’t have to keep this from the others.

“I believe the twins already have some idea.”  Severus admits. “And if you truly trust the group, I trust that.”  

“I trust them.”  Draco nods, grinning.  He knows they’ll take this secret to their graves, just as they promised to keep his.  “Thank you.” Severus smiles, accepting another quick hug, before they duck back into the castle halls and go their separate ways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I'm shameless so let me just causally promote my [Misplaced Fairytales](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1097085) again


	6. Sirius

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took longer than a week. I had a lot going on ^^''  
> [including some money problems, and so maybe if you have a few spare coins you could check this out maybe thank you.](https://www.instagram.com/p/BykvyRXD5XE/)

Standing in the kitchen, mixing hot chocolate as per Remus’ instructions, Sirius can’t help but wonder how this happened.  His godson, Prong’s own child, a Slytherin. A Slytherin with friends from Malfoy and Parkinson to the Weasleys. All of whom are currently in his living room making a pillow forts.

If someone had told him this would be his life when he was a teenager, he would have laughed.  It seems so surreal.

Then again, if someone had told him he’d be blamed for his best mates death and end up in Azkaban he’d also have laughed.  His younger self wasn’t very good at predicting the future. If he had been, he’d never have suggested Peter as the secret keeper.

Sirius shook the thought from his head.  Tonight was meant to be a good night. Harry was heading back to school soon and had invited his friends over for one last night without that old hag watching their every move.  Sirius wasn’t about to bring the mood down because he got lost in bad thoughts.

"How far off is the hot chocolate?"  Despite his nose knowing exactly who'd entered, Sirius looks over to see them anyway.  Blaise leans against the kitchen corner, looking for all the world like he owns the place.  Behind him sits the newest edition to Harry's friends, Theodore, looking very much like he doesn't want to disturb a single speck of dust.

"Not too long."  Sirius assures. "Apparently it needs to be boiling for exactly 412 seconds, and stirred once every 18, then it'll be done."  Oddly specific instructions for Remus to write but Sirius figured Moony was messy with him. Jokes on him, Sirius was going to follow these instructions to a T and act none the wiser.

"Great, we'll camp out here and make sure we actually get some."  Blaise decides. "I swear Millicent would kill for that hot chocolate, certainly she'd maim anyone lining up in front of her." 

"You're just as bad."  Theodore mumbles.

"I haven't the faintest what you're talking about dear Theodore."  Blaise claims.

"With how much you lot are talking this hot chocolate up it had better be the best thing since butterbeer."  Sirius chuckles. "Also you're out of luck on firsts, I already have dibs."

"Can you even drink it?"  Theodore asks and then immediately slams his mouth shut.  A younger him wouldn've boiled with rage, but Sirius had gotten at least a little wiser with age.  There was no cruelty in Theodore's tone, he sounded genuinely interested. Besides, Harry had said he was a curious guy.

"You aren't meant to know that."  Sirius teases, because he's only gotten a little wiser with age.  Theodore looks like a Prongs in headlights and he chuckles. "I'm teasing kid, Harry asked before he told you."  Well it's been less an ask and more a 'we don't keep secrets from each other I have to tell them uncle Sirius’, but specifics.

"Oh."  Theodore says, barely relaxing.

"And no, I probably shouldn't eat chocolate but that's not going to stop me."  He answers. "I'm also as colour blind as a dog, but I was colour blind before hand too."  

"I wonder if that's at all related."  Theodore mumbles, mostly to himself. "If it is, there's probably a way to predict someone's animagus form."

"Draco would be a snake."  Blaise says. "I'd be a peacock, obviously."

“You know they’re only colourful to show off to female peacocks, right?”  Theodore points out. “Actually that’s perfect for you.”

“Oh shut up.”  Blaise huffs. “Fine, I’ll be some that’s pretty just to be pretty.”

"You'd probably be a fish of some kind.  Or a water horse." Theodore guesses.

"You'd be an owl since you're such a know it all."  Blaise claims.

"Owls aren't all that smart."  Theodore argues. "You know nothing about birds."

"So Sirius," Blaise decides to change the subject, "how's the hot chocolate going?"

"Still not done."  Sirius hums, trying to hold back his amusement.  "Did you two really just come here to watch the hot chocolate boil?"

"They're having a pillow fight and I cherish my face."  Blaise answers. "Theodore's just a wuss."

"Buzz off."  Theodore huffs.  "The twins hexed all of the pillows and I am not getting in the middle of that."  He defends.

"See, a wuss."  Blaise says. "But since we're stuck here for several more seconds, have any burning questions about Harry's school life we can answer for you?"

"How does he find more trouble than his father ever managed?"  Sirius asks.

"A mystery to us all."  Blaise says.

"There's several logical answers to that."  Theodore mumbles. "And none of them are his fault."  He quickly adds. There's a story there that Harry hasn't told him, Sirius thinks, but he doesn't ask.  Instead he decides to ask the question that's been bugging him for a while now.

"There is one thing I've been meaning to ask."  He starts.

"Yes I will happily tell you about Harry's love life."  Blaise agrees, grinning.

"Not that."  Sirius grimaces as Theodore mutters, "You're worse than Pansy."  God, Sirius does  _ not _ want to think about Harry doing what he did at Hogwarts.  Doesn't want to think about any of them doing that. They're like, three.

"He doesn't have much of one anyway."  Blaise confides. 

"Good."  Sirius says.  "I wanted to ask how you knew I was innocent in the first place."  The thought had been bugging him from the moment he came to terms with actually being a free man.  Only a handful of deatheaters that  _ might've  _ known the truth and he's pretty sure they're all dead or in Azkaban.

"I didn't."  Blaise hums. The magical timer ends and Sirius pulls the pot off the stove.  He almost drops the thing at Blake's next words. "Professor Snape told me."

"Blaise."  Sirius doesn't hear Theodore's hiss, too busy trying to comprehend that Snivellus had helped clear his name.  Trying to comprehend that Snivellus had  _ known he _ was innocent.

"Snivellus?"  He asks when those thoughts refuse to commute.  "He's the one that told you?"

"Not in so many words but yes,  _ Severus  _ was the one to tell me."  Blaise confirms, magically pouring cups of hot chocolate.

"How did he even know?"  Sirius frowns deeper.

"You'd have to ask him."  Blaise shrugs. He guides Theodore from the room, not letting Sirius get in another question.  It's a few minutes later that Sirius realises Blaise took the first cup of hot chocolate.

Slytherins.

\--

Snivellus Snape is the reason he’s free.

The thought stays with Sirius long after Harry returns to school.  He just doesn’t understand  _ why _ Snape would do that.  What was his motive here?  What did he get out of saving Sirius?  

Why hadn’t he bragged about it?

Sirius likes to think he’s a self-aware man.  He’s well aware he was the bane of Snape’s existence.  Even without the almost getting him killed part. And yeah, he knows he messed up there.  He should have never told Snape about the shrieking shack. Sirius had been sure Snape wouldn’t do it, but he should never have risked that.  It was a bad joke, one he was lucky Remus forgave him for.

Was this some way of getting back at him for that?  Did Snape think that saving Sirius would increase the animagus’ guilt tenfold?  

No, that was stupid.  If that was his plan, Snape would have  _ told _ Sirius.

But then why?  What motive could Snape have to save him?

“That looks like it hurts.”  Remus’ voice snaps Sirius out of his thoughts.  And he’d definitely been deep in them, if he hadn’t even noticed the werewolf coming in.

“What does?”  Sirius frowns, looking over.

“You’re thinking.”  Remus smirks.

“Har har you’re very funny.”  Sirius rolls his eyes. “I do like to think on occasion, it reminds me why I don’t do it often.”  Remus chuckles, sitting on the other side of the couch and leaning against the arm rest to better face Sirius.  

“What were you thinking about?”  Remus asks, tone more serious. Sirius sighs, leaning back and staring up at the ceiling.  It could really use a fresh layer of paint, the old one peeling off in strips.

“Something the Zabini kid told me.”  He says before he gets too distracted.

“Blaise?”  Remus clarifies.  He knows all about Harry’s Slytherin friends, though Sirius has never gotten a straight answer on when or how he found out.

“Yeah.”  He says.

“So?”  Remus prompts when Sirius doesn’t continue.  Sighing again, the animagus turns to face Remus properly.  He’s not sure how to say this, so he might as well spit it out.

“Snape told Blaise I was innocent.”  He says. Remus doesn’t even blink. “You knew?”  He frowns, sitting up properly.

“I did.”  Remus admits.  

“Why didn’t you tell me?”  Sirius asks. “And how did you know?!”

“Severus told me.”  Remus says.

“You’re on a first name basis with Snivellus?  And you guys chat? I didn’t know you were such good friends.”  Sirius scoffs, suspicion flaring in his chest. He’s not sure if it’s Peter’s voice still whispering in the back of his mind or the years of insolation with dementors feeding on his every happy thought.  It’s probably the second. His time at Azkaban left scars Sirius hasn’t really talked since, and usually he’s good at keeping those issues on lockdown. Not tonight, apparently.

“Grow up Sirius, this wasn’t funny when we were kids and it’s not funny now.”  Remus rolls his eyes. Sirius bites his lip and backs down, maybe he had issues before Azkaban too.

“Sorry.”  He says. “It’s just… he’s a deatheater, isn’t he?”  That’s the impression Sirius always had.

“It’s… complicated.”  Remus says. “You really should talk to him about that.”

“How can it be complicated?  He either is a deatheater or he’s not one.”  Sirius frowns. “Which is it?”

“You should ask him.”  Remus repeats. “Privately.”

“Moony, come on.”  Sirius tries. They don’t use those nicknames very often anymore, acutely aware of their missing half.  Acutely aware things aren’t the way they were at Hogwarts.

“It’s not for me to say Padfoot.”  Remus stresses, using Sirius’ own tactic against him.  He uses those nicknames even less than Sirius.

“Would he even want to talk to me?”  Sirius relents. “I’m pretty sure he hates me.”  And he has every reason to, Sirius admits to himself.  

“I don’t know.”  Remus admits. “I’ll bring it up next time we chat.”

“You guys really are friends, huh?”  Sirius comments, trying his hardest not to sound like a suspicious jerk.  He trusts Remus, even if sometimes he has to remind himself of that. “When did that happen?”

“When you almost killed him.”  The words make Sirius tense. They don’t talk about that day ever, not since Sirius begged Remus’ forgiveness.  Even now, years later, the words spiral them into silence.

“I still regret it.”  Sirius breaks the silence before he suffocates.  “I’m sorry.” 

“...I’m glad you did it.”  Remus admits after a moment.  “You shouldn’t have. But if you hadn’t I don’t think the wolfsbane potion would be a thing.”

“What do you mean?”  Sirius frowns.

“Severus invented it, back at Hogwarts.  He got obsessed with finding some way to stop the transformation.”  Remus explains. “It was more than a little confusing the first time he pulled me into an empty room to test the thing.”  He adds, with a chuckle. 

“That’s when you become friends.”  Sirius guesses. He can almost pinpoint when it happened actually, the moment Remus changed from trying a blind eye to his antics to shutting him down for them.  It explains the sudden existence of wolfsbane too. 

“At school.”  Remus confirms with a nod.  There’s more to it, Sirius thinks, but he gets the sense Remus wouldn’t tell him what.  

“Since you know him so well…”  Sirius trails off, hesitating, but if he doesn’t finish it’ll sound worse so he continues.  “Do you think he had a motive? For telling Blaise?”

“You’ll have to ask him.”  Remus’ answer makes him sigh.  “But… for what it’s worth, he told me.”

“Told you his motive?”  Sirius frowns.

“No.”  Remus huffs, shooting him a sharp glance before looking away.  “He told me you were innocent. At the funeral. I’m sorry I couldn’t help you.”

“It’s not your fault.”  Sirius assures, focusing on that instead of the fact Snape was at their funeral.  There’s more to that too, he’s sure. “Most of Blaise’s case was built on things you couldn’t prove.”

“I know.”  Remus says.  “But I still wish I could have helped.”  They slip into silence again, neither sure where to continue.  A few moments pass and Remus sighs, standing from the couch. “I should go.”  He says. “It’s getting late.” Before he can take a step Sirius grabs his hand.

“Stay.”  He says. Pleads.

“What for?”  Remus asks. He doesn’t say ‘I won’t answer anymore questions’, he doesn’t say ‘I don’t want to’.

“I like it, when you’re here.”  Sirius admits. He’s too tired to keep his thoughts to himself anymore.  Remus turns back and stares at him a moment, then he sighs again and takes a step closer.

“Okay.”  He sits back down, this time sitting shoulder to shoulder with Sirius.  They don’t talk much, hands still connected between them. It’s a quiet night, full of things Sirius doesn’t have the energy to ponder anymore, but it’s nice.  He rests his head on Remus’ shoulder and when he wakes up Remus is still there. 

He looks peaceful when he’s asleep, Sirius notes.  Maybe he can make Remus look like that even when he’s awake.

\--

Almost a week later, an owl pecks at his window.  Sirius lets it in, relaxing when he sees it’s not from Hogwarts.  It’s not about Harry then. 

He gives the bird a snack and takes the small strip of parchment from it’s leg, trying not to get his hopes up.  It could be about Snape. Sirius doesn’t want to admit it, but he’s anxious to sit down with the man . To find out what’s really going on.  Trying to convince himself he’s not, he opens the paper.

“Map?”  He reads aloud, frowning.  What the hell did map mean?  Sirius wrecks his brain but he can only think of one map that stands out and surely not… 

Well, he supposes it's worth a shot.  Sirius sets the paper down and pulls out his wand.

“I solemnly swear I am up to no good.”  He says, pressing the wand to the paper.  It blooms with new words almost immediately.  “How the bloody hell does Snape know about our map?”  He mutters, picking up the letter and confirming that it is indeed from the potions master.  His last name signs the bottom.

Above the signature there isn’t much, just a place and a time.  Still, that’s all Sirius really wanted isn’t it? A time to meet and talk.

Now he just has to figure out what to say.

\--

The location turns out to be a cafe.  A very muggle cafe. Sirius frowns as he steps inside, looking down at the note just to make sure he has the right place.  He does, apparently. Had Snape misspelt something? Surely Snape of all people wasn’t asking him to come to a muggle cafe.

“You didn’t strike me as the type that’s never been to a cafe before.”  A voice mocks. Sirius looks up again and just barely recognizes Snape, sitting in one of the booths and wearing very muggle clothing.  

“You didn’t strike me as the type to know what a cafe was.”  Sirius says, making his way over to the booth. 

“Well clearly you don’t know me very well.”  Snape huffs. “I didn’t get you anything, I wasn’t sure what you’d drink.”

“Clearly you don’t know me very well.”  Sirius jokes. He walks to the counter and tries not to think about how weird this is.  

“So,” Snape says once Sirius sits across from him, “you wanted to talk?”  

“Remus thought we should.”  Sirius clarifies. “Apparently, you’re the one that told Blaise I was innocent.”  It’s not a question but Sirius doesn’t continue, wanting confirmation.

“And what does Mr Zabini have to do with your being released?”  Snape asks. “I thought it was the Weasley twins that cleared your name.”

“What?”  Sirius frowns.  By all legal accounts it had been the twins, but he’d figured Snape knew the truth.  Remus would have told him if that wasn’t the case, right? “But you know, don’t you?”

“Of course I know.”  Snape snaps. “That wasn’t the point, you can’t say things like that carelessly.”

“I wasn’t being careless.”  Sirius claims, frowning deeper.  “I knew you knew, how is that careless?”

“We’re in a public place!”  Snape argues. “Anyone could overhear.”

“Who’s going to overhear us in a muggle cafe?  Wasn’t that why you choose to meet here?”

“That’s besides the point.”  Snape huffs. “You have to be careful about these things.”

“I  _ know  _ that.”  Sirius says.  “No one’s found out from me, have they?”  Snape opens his mouth, to argue probably, before shutting it again.  It’s a tense moment before he continues again.

“No, I suppose they haven’t.”  He begrudgingly admits. “Yes, I was the one that told Blaise.”

“Why?”  Sirius asks.  “How did you even know?”  He adds, because he can’t decide which answer he wants more.  Snape takes a sip out of his coffee before he tries to answer and fails.  “Just spit it out already!” Sirius demands when the minutes drag on.

“It’s a long story.”  He finally sighs, running a hand through his hair.  “I’m not even sure where to start.” 

“I have all day.”  Sirius says, and he doesn’t plan on leaving until he understands.  Snape sighs again.

“Peter was his spy, I was Dumbledore’s.”  The words aren’t as much of a surprise as they should be.  The thought had been at the back of his mind ever since that talk with Remus.  “Lily knew from the beginning really. We kept in contact.” He pauses there, like he’s not sure how to continue.  

“And what, she told you I wasn’t the secret keeper?”  Sirius guesses, impatient.

“Yes.”  Snape says and then sighs once more.  “No.”

“Well which is it?”  Sirius demands.

“I was more involved then that.”  Snape says. “She didn’t just tell me you weren’t the secret keeper, she asked my opinion.”

“She asked your opinion?”  Sirius repeats. “What does she think Prongs would have done if you disagreed?  He wouldn’t listen to you.” Snape scoffs a laugh, making Sirius frown deeper.

“He would’ve.”  He claims. “James knew too and we, we were close.”

“Prongs would’ve told me.”  Sirius refuses.

“I asked him not too.”  Snape says. “Remus didn’t even know.  Not until…” He trails off but Sirius gets what he means anyway.  Not until they died. 

“I don’t believe it.  How do I know you aren’t trying to trick me?  Trying to fulfil some sort of delusional fantasy you have about Lily?!”  Sirius demands.

“What?!”  Snape snaps.  “Fuck you!”

“Everyone knows you were obsessed with her.”  Sirius argues. That had to be it. Prongs would never have kept something like this from him.

“I loved her.”  Snape protests. “And I loved him too.”

“Yeah right, you hated him.”  Sirius scoffs. Snape spits something Sirius doesn’t understand and then throws something at him.  Sirius twitches for his wand until the thing lands on the table in front of him. It’s a book. A photo album to be exact.

“You want your proof, there it is.”  Snape says. Still eyeing him, Sirius nevertheless opens the album.  As expected, moving photos sit on every page. Lily’s neat handwriting rests beside each, labelling and dating them.  The first photo is labelled ‘my favourite boys’. It’s a picture of Snape and Prongs on the Potter couch. Snape doesn’t look particularly happy, hand moving to cover his face while Prongs laughs and says something.  

Prongs definitely knew then.  There was the proof right there, in his best friends laughing face.  Sirius still flicks further into the book.

There’s a picture of Snape cooking some potion in the Potter kitchen labelled ‘househusband’.  A picture of Snape and Lily kissing labelled ‘childhood sweethearts, eventually’. There’s a photo of the three of them, clearly posing for the photo until Prongs blows a raspberry on Snape’s cheek and raises his hand to give Lily bunny ears.  It’s labelled ‘I married a ten year old’. There’s some of their marriage photos recreated too, this time with Snape by their side, but most of the photos look candid. Snape’s not in all of them, but Sirius gets the impression he took the ones he’s not in.

There’s a photo on the last page.  Snape and Prongs are curled up on the couch asleep, baby Harry resting between them.  It’s labeled ‘my new favourite boys’.

“You want to know why I told Blaise?”  Snape asks while Sirius just stares at that last photo.  “You were his brother.”

“He never told me.”  Sirius says, practically whispers.

“I asked him not to.”  Snape repeats. “It was too dangerous.”

“And you didn’t like me.”  Sirius adds. Snape doesn’t deny it.  “Does anyone else know?”

“Molly and Arthur.”  Snape says. “Remus knows now, but he didn’t then.  You.”

“Harry?”  Sirius asks, staring at that last page.  They’re all photos of Harry, all before that fateful night.  Snape’s silence is all the answer he needs. “He has a right to know.”

“I know.”  Snape says.  “But I… I can’t.”

“Why not?”  Sirius frowns and then something else dawns on him.  “You left him with Petunia. How could you leave him with Petunia?!”

“I didn’t know!”  Snape snaps. “I knew, I knew she wouldn’t be perfect but I thought, but I  _ hoped _ -” He cut himself off with a tsk.  

“Why?”  Sirius repeats.

“How was I meant to hide him?”  Snape asks. “The deatheaters would kill the both of us if they found him, and I’m not sure I want to know what Dumbledore would have done.  I thought it was for the best.”

“They practically tortured him!”

“And if I’d known that I would have risked it!”  Snape snaps right back. “But I didn’t. Dumbledore kept too close of an eye on him, I couldn’t check on him.”  

“Why not now?”  Sirius asks. “Why not tell him now.”

“You didn’t know.”  Snape says.

“I know now.  I won’t keep you from him.”  Sirius says, surprising the both of them.  The words hadn’t been planned but… but he means them, Sirius decides.  Snape hadn’t had a motive when he told Blaise the truth. He’d done it because Sirius is family.  Even if neither of them want to phrase it that way. Snape is family, just like Prong’s parents and Lily had been.

“I can’t.”  Snape refuses after a moment, looking away.

“You can’t?”  Sirius frowns.  “Snape he deserves to know!”

“ _ I know _ .  But I, I…”  He doesn’t finish.  

“You’re scared.”  Sirius realizes after a moment.  Snape doesn’t deny it.

“I left him with those horrible people for  _ years _ .”  He says.  “How could he forgive me?”

“I almost got you mauled to death.”  Sirius reminds. That one night has come up more in the past week then it has since it happened, he thinks.  “Somehow Remus forgive me, and you still saved me from Azkaban.” 

“I just… I can’t.”  Snape says. “And  _ you _ can’t tell him.  Or anyone, about any of this.  Or one of us really will be mauled to death.”  He threatens. 

“Alright, fine.”  Sirius sighs. “I won’t say anything.”

“Good.”  Snape accepts after a moment.

“But,” Sirius adds.  Snape’s threatening glare immediately returns.  “You have to promise that if anything happens to me you’ll look after him.  Don’t let him go back to Petunia, or worse, Dumbledore.”

“Of course.”  Snape says, insulted by the very doubt.  Sirius sighs, feeling some of the weight on his shoulders lift.  He’s had Remus promise the same thing, and the twins promised it of their own accord, but it’s still good to know Harry has someone else in his corner should the worst happen.  It might not, but Azakaban didn’t leave Sirius a particularly optimistic person.

“Good.”  He says. “I’m thinking pancakes for breakfast and a fresh start, you?”  He says, looking back to the cafe menu.

“Eggs.”  Snape says.

Despite the fresh start, Sirius can’t say he likes Snape all that much.  Snape doesn’t seem to like him all that much either, but they come to something of an understanding, Sirius thinks.  They even have loose plans to talk again, at some point.

\--

Those plans never come to pass.  

Sirius takes Snape’s secret to his grave.  Snape has a drink in his honour, staring at a blacked out photo.  He keeps his side of the promise. Rather than returning to his Aunt’s, Harry finds Remus stepping up.  

Family and magic are entwined, godparents included.  A spell to make him Harry’s godfather should anything happen to Sirius, Remus claims.  It’s easily verified, and no one bothers to date the spell. Only a parent could have cast it.

Sirius watches, dead and unseen, as Remus and Harry step into the manor.

“We should redecorate.”  Remus says, setting down his single bag.  He’d all but moved in before Sirius died, there hadn’t been much left to bring.  “He never did like the manor much.” Harry says nothing, moving past Remus towards the stairs.  Remus doesn’t stop him, just sighs as Harry disappears towards his room.

“I do hate the manor.  I just never got around to doing what I want with it.”  Sirius says, even though he knows Remus can’t hear him. “I thought werewolves were meant to have super hearing.”  He grumbles.

“And I thought dogs were meant to have a sixth sense, but you never noticed me.”  James says.

“I’m still mad at you.”  Sirius claims. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.”

“I’m the one that should be mad, you called my boyfriend delusional.”  James says, poking his tongue out like the mature adult he is. It’s nice being dead, Sirius will admit.  It’s nice being able to bicker with his brother again.

It’s not nice watching the living fall apart.  He looks back to see Remus grabbing the good whiskey out.

“How long will it take them to figure it out?”  Figure out this isn’t what Sirius meant, figure out how to move on, figure out how to be happy.  Sirius isn’t sure which he’s asking, probably all of them and more.

“I don’t know.”  James admits. “Maybe a day, maybe never.”

“That’s helpful.”  Sirius scoffs.

“There’s no being helpful when you’re dead.”  James shrugs. “We just have to hope.” Sirius rolls his eyes.

He hopes they figure it out soon.  Whatever it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So like I'm not as confident with this chapter as most tbh, but I'm still pretty happy with the end result. I hope you enjoyed!
> 
> [ And if you did, maybe you could check out this please](https://www.instagram.com/p/BykvyRXD5XE/)


	7. Neville (and the DA)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I LIVE!  
> I'm not sure why this chapter took me so long to write? It kinda just did. It was fun to write though, especially writing Blaise and writing how Neville changes over his last year. Luna was also really fun to write. 
> 
> The next chapter is already half done and the one after that is completely finished, so the next update shouldn't take that long.

Neville has never thought of himself as particularly brave or courageous.  Actually, he’s never thought of himself as even a little brave or courageous.  Everything seems to make him jump or tremble, often both, and he knows he sticks out like a sore thumb among his fellow Gyfindors.

But sometimes it doesn’t matter that you aren’t brave. 

Ron isn’t around to run Dumbledore’s Army, Harry’s not around to train them.  Someone has to step up and try to fill those shoes. Especially this year with a war breathing down their necks and non-Slytherins barred from so much as thinking about proper Defence against the Dark Arts.

_ “Someone needs to step up.”   _ He remembers Harry telling Seamus during that first training session.  No matter what Harry did, some Gyfinador’s would always distrust a Slytherin.   _ “Who cares what house they’re from?” _

_ “It’s the right thing to do, what more do you need?” _   Ron had said when he was recruiting Neville, trying to convince him to take the risk and damn the consequences.  

Those words echo through him now, standing in an office that looks almost the same save who sits in the headmaster’s chair.  Someone needs to step up, it’s the right thing to do. So it doesn’t matter that he’s trembling as Headmaster Snape stares him down.  It doesn’t matter that he’s flinching at the very idea of what might happen to him.

What matters is that those Third Years got away.  Neville counts himself lucky that Malfoy had been patrolling alone when he found them, or else the confusion might not have been enough to ensure their escape.

Of course, it would have been luckier if Draco hadn’t found them at all, or if Neville had managed to escape too.  But he doesn’t dwell on that, it won’t help him now.

“Malfoy tells me you were attempting to teach some third years to block a hex.”  Snape finally breaks the tense silence and Neville is almost relieved. Except that this means he’s probably about to get hexed himself, at best.

“I-I wasn’t.  We were just going over theory.”  He claims, repeating lies he and the girls had practiced a thousand times.  Well, he’d practiced them a thousand times, the girls hadn’t needed to. Ginny had never had trouble lying and Luna is, well, Luna.  

Neville has always been terrible at lying and he isn’t Luna, so he’d practiced.  Even that hadn’t been enough, if Snape’s face is anything to go off.

“Theory?”  The new headmaster repeats.  “With your wands out?”

“Um.”  Neville gulps.  “Yes?” He tries, hesitant and trying to think.  Do they have an answer for that? What is he meant to say?  After too much time has passed, he manages to continue. “W-we were going over wand technique… um, as well.”  

Oh god he is so screwed.  Snape is going to kill him, and his gran is going to be so ashamed he died because he couldn’t form a decent lie.  

“So you’re saying you weren’t trying to teach a group of third years how to block a hex?”  Snape asks again, probably dragging it out for just to watch him squirm.  

“Yes s-sir.”  Neville says. Snape’s gaze shifts to Malfoy and Neville almost wants to turn around and see whatever Snape does.  Is Malfoy getting his wand out right now? Or something worse? Is there something worse?

“And if I asked, would you say you aren’t continuing to run the supposed ‘Dumbledore’s Army’?”  Snape continues. Shock shuts Neville up. This, this something worse. “Well?” Snape prompts.

“N-no, no we’re not, um, that is, well-”  Neville stumbles on his words, hands practically vibrating at his sides.  

“Spit it out Longbottom.”  Malfoy huffs from behind him, making Neville jump.  “We know you are.”

“Draco.”  Snape scolds, frowning for a moment before his face returns to neutral.  “Mr Longbottom, are you running Dumbledore’s army?”

“No sir.”  Neville manages.

“I see.”  Snape says.  “Then I suppose we’re done here.”  What?

“What?”  Malfoy echos Neville’s thoughts.  “Headmaster, we know they’re still running Dumbledore’s army!  I bet you they’re using the Chamber of Secrets as a headquarters, since it’s much safer than the Room of Requirement.”  Confusion out weighs Neville’s fear for just a minute. The Chamber of Secrets? Why would they be using the Chamber of Secrets?  No one knows the entrances, and more importantly that place is a death trap!

“We both know you need a parseltongue to enter the chamber Draco.”  Snape says.  

“I’m sure Potter ordered some snake to help them.”  Malfoy scoffs and what the hell is going on? If… If Neville didn’t know any better he’d almost think they were suggesting the Chamber.

But of course not.  Or if they were, it was definitely a trap.

“And I bet Potter even made them a map of all the entrances, probably charmed like that other map of his.”  Malfoy adds.  

What the bloody hell are they talking about?

“That’s enough.”  Snape says, effectively quieting Malfoy.  “This is your one and only warning Mr Longbottom, don’t get caught teaching ‘theory’ after curfew again.  Draco, escort him back to Gryffindor tower.”

“Fine.”  Malfoy huffs.  “Follow me Longbottom, don’t fall too far behind.”  Quiet, still reeling from the conversation and the fact he isn’t being hexed into next week, Neville does.  

Hogwarts isn’t meant to be this silent, he thinks as their footsteps echo through the empty halls.  Sure it’s long past curfew, but… well it just felt wrong is all. They’ve almost reached the dorm when something flutters from Malfoy’s robes.  Neville’s steps falter, surprised by the parchment, which makes Malfoy look back.

“Well?”  Malfoy huffs.  “Pick it up, don’t litter.”  He orders.

“But…”  Neville starts, stopping himself at Malfoy’s glare.  He puts the parchment in his pocket and they continue to the dorms.

“Don’t get caught out again.”  Malfoy reminds before Neville slips into the dorm.  Snape had something similar by only now does Neville notice the weird phrasing.  Why are they telling him not to get caught?

“Neville!”  Ginny is waiting for him on the other side of the portrait.  “Are you alright?”

“I’m… fine.”  Neville mumbles, still not quite believing it.

“What happened?!”  Ginny demands. She listens, frowning deeper as his relays the conversation and how Draco had dropped something.  “What’s on the parchment?” She asks so Neville pulls it out.

“It’s blank.”  He says, all the more confused.

“Blank?”  Ginny repeats, snatching the parchment from his hands.  She inspects it but can only confirm what Neville said. The parchment is blank, without so much as a speck of dust.  “Why would he give you a blank sheet of paper?”

“Maybe he’s just messing with me.”  Neville suggests. “Like, psychological torture or something.”

“Deatheaters aren’t usually so indirect.”  Ginny points out. She turns the paper over but can still find nothing.  “We should bring it up with Luna in the morning, see what she thinks.”

“Hopefully it’s just a blank piece of paper and it doesn’t mean anything.”  Neville mumbles. 

“I doubt it.”  Ginny shrugs, handing it back.  “Here, you hold on to it.”

“Why me?”

“Well if it’s hexed, I don’t want to sleep with it under my pillow.”  Ginny smirks, already halfway up the stairs before Neville can start freaking out.  Except he can’t start freaking out because everyones asleep and he really doesn’t want to wake them all up.  Gulping, Neville heads to his dorm with the paper in hand.

He pointedly doesn’t look at Ron’s empty bed as he settles in.  

* * *

“I’m sure Draco wouldn’t give you a blank piece of parchment.”  Luna hums the next day, sitting regal in her seat while Ginny paces and Neville fidgets.  The Room of Requirement might have fixed itself but it doesn’t feel so safe anymore, not after it was almost destroyed.  “There must be something we’re missing.”

“But what?!”  Ginny exclaims.  She’s been practically tearing her hair out all day trying to figure out this puzzle.  “How can we miss something? It’s not exactly a large piece of parchment.”

“It’s not small either.”  Luna notes. “I don’t think Draco dropped it on accident.”

“That part we guessed.”  Neville sighs. “But if we  _ are  _ missing something and it is important, why would he even give it to me?”

“Maybe it’s a message.”  Luna suggests.

“Then it’s probably just an insult.”  Ginny snaps. “Or some sort of ‘join us or else’.”

“I think there’s more to it than that.  Something we aren’t seeing.” Luna says.  “Why, that’s it, isn’t it?” She smiles.

“What’s it?”  Neville asks nervously.  

“The paper isn’t blank, we just can’t see it.”  Luna lays out the paper to it’s full size. “It’s invisible.”

“If it’s invisible how are we meant to see it?”  Ginny asks.

“I bet there’s a password.”  Luna smiles.

“Like what?”  Neville frowns.   

Luna clears her throat and manages an impressive Malfoy-voice when she mutters, “Potter”.  Unfortunately, the page remains blank. “Well, it was worth a short.”

“Maybe it’s the same as the Slyhterin Common Room password?”  Neville suggests.

“We don’t know that.”  Luna says. “Surely if Draco gave you this, he wants you to be able to find the message.  Maybe it’s something only you would know Neville.”

“But I don’t know any passwords!”  Neville protests.  

“Maybe he told you it last night.”  Luna says. “Think Neville, what did he say?”

“I don’t think that’ll help.”  Ginny speaks up. Looking over, Neville finds her staring intently at the map with an odd look on her face. 

“What do you see Ginny?”  Luna asks. “You look very focused.”

“I think I know what it is.”  Ginny says. She places her wand on the parchment and clears her throat.  “ _ I solemnly swear I am up to no good. _ ”  Black ink spills from the spot her wand is touching and Luna squeals in excitement.

“It’s a map!”  She says. “Two maps.”  She corrects, because the map had two clear levels.  

“How did you know the password?”  Neville asks.

“...The twins have a map with that password.  Or had it, I think they gave it to Harry and Millicent.”  Ginny explains. “But how would Malfoy know about that?”

“We’ll have to ask him.”  Luna says. “There’s no X, but that looks like the place to find treasure, don’t you think?”  She asks, pointing to a box on the lower map. It looks to be a chamber, marked by a face with an open mouth.  “I wonder what it is.”

“It’s the Chamber of Secrets.”  Ginny says, eyes wide as she stares at the face.

“Malfoy and Snape were talking about the Chamber of Secrets last night.  It’s where they thought the DA was meeting.” Neville says. Ginny’s hands have started to shake, he notices, but he isn’t sure he can help.  Luna starts to refold the map, hiding the face.

“Or maybe,” she says, “its where they think we  _ should  _ be meeting.”

“Or maybe it’s a trap.”  Ginny argues. 

“There’s only one way to find out.”  Luna points out. The map is folded now, revealing the words on it’s front.

_ The Spying Slytherins politely invite you to the Chamber of Secrets.  Refreshments will be provided, please bring your own snacks. _

* * *

That night, the three of them stand before a seemingly normal section of wall.  On the map, the section is marked with a red dot and hovering their wands over the dot had revealed instructions to open the chamber.  There’s a number of red dots on the map but this one was the easiest one to get to.  

No one mentions the dot resting in the girl’s bathroom.  Or mentions Ginny’s first year at all. But as Luna starts opening the chamber, Neville looks over and realizes they really should say  _ something _ .  

“Are you okay?”  He asks, quietly.

“I’m fine.”  Ginny claims.  She’s not. She’s shaking like a leaf and Neville’s not sure she’s blinking.

“You don’t have to come.”  He says. “We can do this alone, and we won’t think less of you.”  Ginny hesitates before sighing, her shoulders slumping.

“I don’t really remember what happened that night.”  Ginny admits in a small voice. It’s weird, Neville’s not used to her sounding so scared.  “Before I saw the map, I didn’t even remember what the chamber looked like. I have to do this Neville.”

“Okay.”  He accepts.  “I’m here for you.”

“We both are.”  Luna hums, rather more matter-of-factly.   In front of her, the wall slips open and down, steps leading into darkness.  “Come on. We mustn’t keep my cousin waiting.” Ginny takes Neville’s hand in her left and steps up, taking Luna’s in her left.

“Yeah, let’s.”  She says. They step into the chamber together and Neville’s not sure whose shaking more - him or Ginny.

 

The Chamber is almost exactly what Neville was expecting.  It’s large with creepy statues and murky water and a constant dripping sound.  But it’s also clean. There isn’t any dust or human bones, which, he’ll admit, he was fully expecting.  The Slytherins aren’t even wearing their darkest robes. Well, except Blaise who also has the hood up and is looking properly ominous.  Neville mets his eye and quickly looks away, gulping. This was a terrible idea.

“I don’t think it used to be this clean.”  Ginny voices, looking around. Her grip is vice tight on Neville’s hand. 

“Well you can’t expect Tiffany to clean up, she doesn’t have hands.”  Malfoy huffs in front of them. “And You Know Who was a slob.”

“Draco.”  Zabini gasps.  “Badmouthing the dark lord, oh no.  You’ve been corrupted, we’ll have to tell your father to up the brainwashing.”

“Oh shove off Blaise, you aren’t helping.”  Parkinson rolls her eyes. “And take that hood off would you, the cult look doesn’t match your eyes.”

“But it works so well with my dramatics.”  Zabini argues. Even so he drops the hood.

“So, we came.”  Ginny butts in. “What do you want?”

“Can’t you guess?”  Parkinson says.

“Oh god we’re going to die, this was a terrible idea.”  Neville finally says it outloud, thoughts getting just a little too loud to keep in his head.

“We aren’t going to kill you.”  Nott frowns. “You’d seriously think we’d go through all this effort just to kill you?” 

“I would.”  Zabini chirps.

“Not helping.”  Malfoy snaps, rubbing the bridge of his nose.  “We didn’t call you here to kill you Longbottom.”

“You’re here to help us.”  Luna guesses. She isn’t even looking at the Slytherins, instead scratching under the chin of the snake on her shoulder.  It had appeared when they reached the door and though Neville hadn’t said it, he was pretty sure the snake had opened the door.  “Is this your snake cousin? She’s very pretty.”

“Eris says thanks.”  Draco says as the snake hisses.  What? “And yes, we called you down here because we want to help.”   _ What _ .

“You want to help us?”  Neville repeats. “Thats… I don’t… it has to be a trick.”  He says, turning back to his friends. Neither are listening to him.  Luna is still more interested in the snake but Ginny is focused solely on Malfoy, staring him down.  Neville waits, growing more anxious by the second. Finally,  _ finally _ , Ginny speaks.

“I believe them.”  She says.

“What?!”  Neville can’t help but exclaim. 

“I remember now.”  She explains. “Malfoy saved me that night.”

“I saved Tiffany, mostly.”  Malfoy mumbles. “I’m sure Harry would have been able to save you himself.”  Harry, Neville notes, he calls him Harry not Potter. What the hell?

“I’m glad we’re all on the same side.”  Luna hums. “I think we’ll get much farther together than apart.”

“Our thoughts exactly.”  Parkinson nods.  

“If nothing else, the Chamber of Secrets is much safer than the Room of Requirement.  It has quick access out of the castle and a direct line to the kitchens.” Nott says.  

“And the best guard snake.”  Zabini says. Somewhere, Neville hears something shift and feels a shiver go down his spine.  

“I thought…”  He trails off, torn between trying to spot the snake and shutting his eyes tight.

“Harry never said he killed her.”  Malfoy points out. “She’s harmless, to those she’s protecting anyway.  What happened before wasn’t her fault.”

“I really don’t know about this guys.”  Neville whispers, turning to the girls.  

“Neville, they have an in.”  Ginny points out. “They’ll know patrols and news long before we can catch on.”

“Besides, they’re Harry’s friends.”  Luna hums. “I can tell.” Nodding to herself, Ginny lets go of their hands and clears the distance between her and Malfoy.

“We’re not saying we trust you, not fully not yet.”  She says, holding out her hand. “But we’ll work with you.”

“That’s all I’m asking.”  Malfoy says. They shake on it and Neville prays they haven’t just made a deal with the devil.  

“Wonderful!”  Zabini grins. “Now pull out those snacks, lets get to know each other.”  He says. With a wave of his wand, a table laid with steaming hot chocolate and frothy Butterbeer appears.

“Snacks?”  Ginny repeats, frowning.

“It was on the invitation, remember?”  Luna says. “I thought Neville would be getting them.  He has friends in the kitchen.”

“I didn’t think the invitation was serious!”  Neville argues.

“Then you’re lucky Blaise came prepared.”  Nott says.

“What?  No way, those are my snacks.”  Zabini refuses. “If they didn’t bring any snacks they can go hungry.”

“Blaise just call the food down.”  Malfoy says, rubbing the bridge of his nose again.

“Ignore him,” Parkinson tells them, “he’s an idiot.”

“That’s a handsome idiot to you.”  Zabini protests. He waves his word again and food appears on the table as well.  “Well? We’re not going to bite.” He tells them, gesturing to the table. Luna wastes no time, Ginny sitting almost as quickly but more cautiously.  Neville sits between them, knee tapping anxiously against the table.

“So, tell us how far you’ve gotten.”  Malfoy instrusts.

“First,” Ginny says firmly, “who else knows about this?”

“Harry and Millicent don’t know exactly what we’re doing, what with them being on the run, but they know about us.”  Malfoy answers.  

“And Ron?”  Ginny asks.

“He doesn’t.  Fred and George know.”  Malfoy answers.

“Anyone else?”  Malfoy hesitates at that one before sighing.  

“Well, since we are meant to be trusting each other.”  He starts. “Snape knows. He’s been spying on You Know Who before any of us were even born.”  

“He’s also Malfoy’s godfather.”  Parkinson adds. “What? We’re meant to be completely honest aren’t we?”  She smirks when Malfoy glares at him.

“Okay…”  Ginny accepts, though she doesn’t sound like she entirely believes that.  Neville’s not sure he believes that. Snape  _ killed  _ Dumbledore.  

But then, Snape could have killed him last night.  At the very least, he could have tortured Neville. A deatheater would’ve.  Snape didn’t. It could all be a ploy, some sort of trick. But Malfoy’s right, this is a lot of effort for no real reason.  And Luna and Ginny are right, if they are trustworthy they’ll be a lot of help.

So, Neville decides to believe them.

“You turn.”  Nott prompts.

Sitting at that table, Neville is still terrified of these Slytherins.  But watching them listen and statergize, listening to them bicker between each other, they look a lot more human than he’s ever seen before.

* * *

It’s easier than Neville excepts to move the DA into the Chamber of Secrets.  Really, the hardest part is deciding to actually do it. The Slytherin’s think it’s a good idea, and logically Neville knows they’re right.  But this isn’t his decision, or Luna’s.  

It’s Ginny’s.

The Chamber of Secrets might be the figurative nightmare of Neville’s childhood, but it’s the literal one of Ginny’s.  She still grips his hand vice tight every time they go to meet the Slytherins, and he’s sure she holds Luna’s just as tight.  Neither of them are about to decide they make her nightmare their base of operations. Instead they wait, anxiously in Neville’s case, for Ginny to decide.

In the end, it’s the basilisk that prompts her decision.  Two days later, the DA officially moves into the Chamber.

They have to be careful, of course.  They can’t just announce they’ve moved into the Chamber, and they can’t just go around handing out maps of the entrances.  Instead they show older DA members a few entrances each, and those DA members pass it on to the younger members. The Slytherins involvement is told to no one.

It’s their idea, not that Neville or Luna or Ginny really argue it.  Bad enough to be hiding an entire anti-Death Eater army, it’s too risky to be hiding spies too.  The DA runs Muggle Studies and Defence Against the Dark Arts in the Chamber, and the Slyherins slip them textbooks and supplies in the Room of Requirement.  It’s a system that works surprisingly well, but Neville’s not actually surprised by that. He’s pretty sure the Slytherin’s have been planning this for a while, maybe even from before the school year started.

There’s only one real problem.  The Night Watch.

Night Watch is something they started when the detentions proved to be just torture.  Someone needed to stay at the base, just in case. This was a risky task when they were sitting in the Room of Requirement, because you had to go out and find the room to sit in it.  But with how easy it is to get into the Chamber... 

Well the first night, every seventh year DA member showed up.  Plus a couple of sixth years.

Neville tried to insist they needed to sleep, that they only needed a couple of students each night.  Luna could barely get everyone to agree to rotating out houses every night.  

“I can’t believe Harry didn’t tell us about this place sooner.”  Seamus says. Tonight is Gyfindor’s watch. They’re sitting in a rough circle in the main chamber, sipping on a herbal concoction Neville’s ensured will keep them up tonight and tomorrow and munching on cookies Draco managed to convince a house elf to bring down.  “It would’ve been good to know about.”

“Maybe he was worried you’d blow it up.”  Dean teases. Silence returns for a moment before Dean sighs.  “I wonder what those four are doing right now. I wish they’d send us news.”

“They’d get caught before the owl even took off.”  Ginny says. It’s become something of a motto for her, one she mutters whenever she’s missing her brother.  

“I know.”  Dean says. “I just… wonder.”  He mumbles, ignoring the other 'w' word they try not to utter these days.  They’re always worrying - about their families, about the Golden four, about their classmates.  But somehow admitting it feels like it’d make it all… worse.

“I’m sure they’re alright.”  Neville lies. “I mean, with those four how can they be anything but?”

“I hope they’re more alright than us.”  Lavender mumbles, eyes in her cup like she can read the herbs in there.  They won’t do her much good, they don’t have any future-telling properties.  Neville makes a mental note to see if he can grow any in the plot Professor Sprout gave him, at the very back of the greenhouse where no one looks.  Maybe it’ll help cheer her up a little.

“Yeah, I hope there’s only one of them keeping watch at night.”  Seamus jokes, making most of them laugh even though Neville doesn’t think they should find that very funny.  Maybe it’s just better to laugh than to admit how messed up all of this is.

Neville takes another sip of his drink and pushes the rising panic away.  He’s never really done that before, pushed his fear down and just kept going.  But then, he’s never had people looking up to him before. Or felt like if he did give in, and really let his fear consume him, he might never get up again.

“How long do you think it’ll be until everything's back to normal?”  Dean asks quietly, when the silence threatens to come back. His question doesn’t really fight it off, everyone else hesitating to answer.

“It won’t.”  Ginny finally speaks up, blunt as ever.  “How could it?”

“It’ll get better though, right?”  Dean asks, maybe a little too quickly.  “Once Harry stops You Know Who, and Snape gets fired, and the Slytherin’s get expelled.  Then everything’ll be better.” Neville looks over to Ginny but she’s looking at her cup.   

“I’m… I’m not sure Snape’s a bad guy.”  Parvati practically whispers. It’s the first thing she’s said all night and Neville has been growing worried.  She’s not usually this quiet.

“What?”  Seamus frowns.  “Of course he’s bad!  He’s the reason all this started!”  He exclaims, voice getting progressively louder.

“I, I know but…”  Parvati starts only to cut herself off.

“Parvati, what happened?”  Ginny asks.

“You can tell us.”  Lavender says when Parvati still hesitates, tone softer than anyone else.

“I got detention yesterday.”  Parvati finally admits and the room goes tense.  “I was practicing a hex under my breath and I didn’t notice there were Slytherin’s behind me.  They took me to Parkinson, and she took me to Snape.”  

“What did he do?”  Seamus asks.

“Nothing.”  Parvati says, like she can’t really believe it herself.  “I mean, he made me write lines. And I thought it’d be one of those horrible black magic quills, but it wasn’t.  It was just a normal quill.” She explains.

“What did he make you write?”  Lavender asks.

“I will not get caught casting hexes.  For ten minutes, I think.” Parvati says.  “Then he cast a healing charm on me and told me I shouldn’t tell anyone what happened.”

“A healing charm?”  Seamus frowns. “If he didn’t do anything, why would he cast something like that?”

“To make it look like he did something.”  Ginny suggests. “Something so bad he  _ had _ to heal her.”

“That’s ridiculous.”  Seamus decides. “Maybe someone's used polyjuice potion and it’s not actually Snape.”  

“If it was that easy to trick the deatheaters, surely someone would have done it already.”  Dean says.  

“But what else could it be?”  Seamus asks.

“That maybe Snape’s… not a bad guy.”  Lavender mumbles.  

“He killed Dumbledore!”  Seamus shouts. “And he’s a horrible person!  We all know that!”

“Do we?”  Dean asks.  “I mean, none of the teachers ever tell us anything.  Maybe there’s something else going on.”

“I’ve had younger students tell me the same thing about detention with Snape.”  Ginny says.  

“Maybe it’s a trick.”  Seamus decides.

“You thought Harry was a trick too.”  Dean reminds. Seamus opens his mouth to object but closes it without saying anything.

“I’ll look into it.”  Neville speaks up before he thinks.  How, he wonders, is he meant to look into something he already knows and he already knows is a huge secret?  Ginny seems to be asking the same question, an eyebrow raised his direction, but everyone else…

Everyone else looks like they need a little bit of assurance.  Like they need something to trust. Somehow, Neville decides, he needs to figure this out for them.

“I mean, Professor Sprout trusts me.  I’m sure if there’s something going on she’ll tell me.”  He says, making it up as he goes. 

“Alright.”  Seamus accepts.  “If you say he’s safe he has to be.  I mean, you’re Neville.” He reasons.  

* * *

Pacing the Room of Requirement, Neville tries not to panic too obviously.  He’s not sure how much longer he has before he needs to be in his Dark Arts class, but he knows it’s not a lot of time.  He can’t get away with skipping potions the way he can herbology, he’ll definitely end up in detention if he tries. But he really doesn’t want to leave before one the Slytherin’s shows up.  He doesn’t have an excuse lined up if he doesn’t ‘talk to Professor Sprout’. Especially because he had herbology today!

“Did you need me?”  A voice cuts through his anxious thoughts and Neville jumps, a hex already in his mouth before he sees Theodore.  “Sorry.” The slytherin winces. It’s impossible to reconcile this Theodore, as sheepish and as awkward as him, with the Theodore that bullied at Draco’s side.  But then it’s also impossible to reconcile those two Dracos. Or any of the Slytherins for that matter.

“Sorry.”  Neville mumbles.  “I didn’t hear the door open.”

“You were pacing pretty loud.”  Theodore notes. “Everything alright?”

“Yes.”  Neville claims.  “No. Kind of?” He tries.

“What happened?”  Theodore frowns. Neville sighs, taking a deep breath and trying to recenter himself the way Luna’s been teaching him too.  Theodore waits, patient and unbothered.

“Parvati had detention with Professor Snape.”  Neville says. “Now everyone’s wondering if Snape’s good or bad or trying to trick us and I told them I’d ask Sprout about it, and now I’m not sure what to do to convince them Snape is good without blowing everyone’s cover.”  

“You didn’t just… tell them?”  Theodore asks, tilting his head in that way he sometimes does.  Neville’s still not sure if it confusion or curiosity, maybe it’s both.

“Of course not.”  He assures. “I wouldn’t do that.  Not without your permission.” For a moment, Theodore just stares at him.  Then the Slytherin nods.

“Okay.”  He accepts, then he starts to think.  Neville tries not to fidget, acutely aware of time ticking away.  “It’s probably a good idea for the DA to know Professor Snape’s a good guy.  Or for at least some of them to know, the trustworthy ones.” He mumbles.  

“But how would we explain that without telling them about you guys?  Should we tell them about you guys?” Neville asks.

“No.”  Theodore shuts that down fast, with a panic that he quickly schools.  “We’ll have to do something that’ll convince them he has reason to be without explaining it all.  Wait here, I’ll ask Draco.”  

“I can’t.”  Neville shakes his head.  “I have Dark Arts.”

“We’ll get you out of it.”  Theodore brushes him off. “I’ll be back soon.”  He’s gone before Neville can continue protesting.  Taking a seat, Neville accepts all he can do is wait and try not to remember what detention with Carrow is like.

He quickly stands back up when his eyes start growing heavy.  

“Room of Requirement, I really need a door to the kitchens.”  He calls. The herbs are in his back pocket, all he needs is some boiling water and he can make his Wake Up tea.

But the Room of Requirement’s door doesn’t budge.   _ It must need to stay there for Theodore _ , Neville thinks,  _ I’ll have to stay up some other way. _

 

Neville wakes up to someone shaking his arm and this time the hex is half way out of his mouth before he realizes it’s just Theodore.

“Oh my god I am so sorry, you startled me.”  He says, quickly pulling away with a hand over his mouth.

“Are you okay?”  Theodore frowns, concerned.  

“I’m fine.”  Neville claims.  “Did, did you talk to Draco?”  Theodore hesitates but drops his worry.

“Here.”  He says, holding out a photo for Neville.  “Professor Snape gave it to Draco, it’s a photo of him and Harry’s parents.  It was taken by Molly Weasley. If you show the DA this and Ginny says her mum mentioned a spy, they should put the pieces together themselves.”  He explains. Neville nods, looking down at the photo. The man in the middle of a smiling James and Lily is very clearly Professor Snape, but at the same time Neville almost can’t believe it’s him.  He’s never seen Professor Snape smile before.

“Only tell the most trusted DA members.”  Theodore says firmly. “If this picture gets into the wrong hands, Professor Snape is dead.”

“I won’t.”  Neville promises. 

“I’m serious Neville, all of us are screwed if you mess this up.”  Theodore stresses. The fears Neville is trying to ignore squeeze at his heart.  That’s a lot of pressure.

But… at the same time it also feels a little nice to be so trusted.

“I’ll take it to my grave Theodore.”  He says, not a hint of a stutter to his voice.  “Promise.”

“Alright then.”  Theodore nods. “Oh, and we told Carrow we were using you for hexing practice, probably best to pretend you have a limp.”

* * *

They tell the seventh years and a handful of sixth years, just the ones that have been around since the start.  Everyone swears themselves to secretency, even if the idea of Snape being a spy brings more questions than answers.  Some of them Neville desperately wants to answer - who else knows, who else can we trust - but others even he doesn’t know.

Why did Snape kill Dumbledore?

* * *

The thing is, Neville is a hypocrite.

He knows that, he’s accepted that.  It’s just… it’s important to him that everyone has a safe place to go.  So yes, he told everyone off for coming to watch when they didn’t need to.  And yes he lectured them all on the importance of getting a full night’s rest.

And yes, here he is sneaking through the halls of Hogwarts  _ just in case _ .

It’s just that... the DA members have the Chamber to go to, but everyone else doesn’t.  Neville can’t sleep thinking about kids walking terrified through the halls of Hogwarts as they wait for a Carrow to find them, detentions or chores keeping them out past curfew.  The thought pushes him to sneak out every night, watching for wayward students that need a hand sneaking back to their room.

And maybe doing this every night and never really sleeping was a bad idea.  And maybe he should have expected his luck to run out.

Basically, Neville is so very lucky it’s Blaise that finds him stumbling around past curfew.  

“It’s just me.”  Blaise says, rolling his eyes like stepping up behind someone and putting your hand over their mouth is a totally normal thing.  “Are you going to scream?” He asks, removing his hand when Neville shakes his head.

“Uh, hi.”  Neville mumbles, turning around to face him.  “What are you doing here?”

“I get to patrol whenever I feel like it.”  Blaise shrugs, leaning against the wall and crossing his arms over his chests.  “I’m pretty sure you’re not meant to up.”

“Well…”  Neville tries, gulping.  

“You look like shit.”  Blaise continues, not waiting for a response.

“U-um.”  Neville stutters.

“Theodore said you had some serious bags under your eyes.”  Blaise says. “You trying to run away there?” 

“I… no?”  Neville frowns.  Blaise was talking too much and too fast to keep up.  

“Then what’s with the bags?”  Blaise asks.

“What?”  Neville asks, confused.  Blaise sighs.

“Longbottom, you look like you haven’t sleep like, all term.”  He finally says it plainly.

“Uh, well, I don’t think it’s been that long.”  Neville mumbles, though now that he’s thinking about it he can’t actually remember if that’s true.  Has he slept this term? He’d probably napped once or twice. But really, there’s too much going on.  It wouldn’t be right for him to sleep.

“That isn’t good for you.”  Blaise says. “Nevermind how risky it is to try and sneak around on zero sleep.  You’re going to get yourself caught.”

“I haven’t been caught yet.”  Neville points out.

“That’s because most of the patrolling team is on your side and has successfully been keeping people away from you.”  Blaise claims. “Your luck won’t last forever.”

“Someone has to make sure the students are safe.”  Neville argues. 

“Sure, but that someone doesn’t have to be you.”  Blaise frowns. “You’re going to run yourself ragged.”

“No one else can do it.”  Neville says, even though he knows that’s not true.  All of the DA can and would do it, but he can’t ask them too.

“I could.”  Blaise offers and okay maybe Neville hasn’t been sleeping enough.  No way Blaise just offered that.

“What?”  He frowns.  “No, you can’t do it.  What if you get caught?  And nevermind that, no one would trust you.”

“I’m hurt.”  Blaise jokes.  “I can tell them I’m part of the DA.”

“Then why did we just that whole song and dance about Snape to hide your identity?”  Neville huffs.  

“You’re right, I’ll just have to hide my identity somehow.”  Blaise hums, sounding very much like he’s not actually thinking that hard about it.  “Oh, I know, I’ll disguise myself as you. You tell the DA that if they see you walking around with a red band on your wrist it’s actually a trustworthy Slytherin that’s just a bit too scared to tell everyone their identity.  All of the SS can get involved.” There’s no way Blaise just thought of that right now, and it’s probably not as foolproof as it’s sounding to his sleep-needing mind.  

But, well, they could use all the help they can get and maybe this means a little less sneaking around and lying to his DA members.  

Taking a deep breath, Neville nods.

“Okay.”  He says. “Okay, I’ll bring it up with Ginny and Luna.”

“Great!”  Blaise grins.  “Now go to bed.”

* * *

Blaise’s plan goes much smoother than Neville was expecting, like most of the Slytherin’s plans now that he thinks about it.  Most of the DA are hesitant at first but it only takes a handful of stories of the Spying Slytherins helping out before there on board.  Soon, it becomes a common sight for Neville to see a second him sitting in the Chamber chatting with DA members.

Despite most respecting the secrecy of the SS, he still overhears gossip of those trying to figure out who the anonymous helpers might be.  Neville’s not sure if it’s a good or bad thing that no one even comes close to the truth.

* * *

“Finally!”  Blaise huffs as he storms into the Room of Requirement, quickly calling a stack of papers to his arms.  

“You’re late.”  Pansy notes, not looking up from the first year DADA textbook she’d saved.  

“One must be fashionable.”  Blaise claims, as if he’s not always right on time.  Or, more usually, early. Neville had been a little unnerved to arrive and not see Blaise already lounged (or posed, as he said) against one of the lounges or one of the other Slytherins.  His unease had only grown as the minutes dragged on, mind supplying all the horrible reasons that made his classmates late to class. Seeing Blaise now, without a hair out of place, Neville lets out the breath he’s been holding.

“Why were you so late?”  Ginny asks. The Slytherin’s seem to have this round about way of asking questions that they just didn’t see the point in.

“Isn’t that a great question.”  Blaise hums. They seem to have this round about way of answering questions too.  Blaise moves to the middle of the room, placing the papers on a table that hadn’t been there a moment ago.  “I present to you all, the lesson plans for Third Year DADA. You have no idea how hard it was to track these things down.”

“I imagine it wasn’t easy.”  Luna hums, looking over it. “How is second year going?”

“As well as any of the muggle studies lesson plans are going.”  Blaise answers.

“So you’re going off of memory and the occasional letter to Lupin?”  Draco says. He hasn’t even looked up, attention still on the potion lessons he’s planning.  They don’t run nearly as many potions classes as they do DADA and muggle studies ones, but it’s true the deatheaters cut out a lot of potions they deemed ‘lesser’ which Draco has been trying to fix.

“Exactly.”  Blaise falls into a chair that also hadn’t been there a minute ago.  Ever since they started these meeting, Neville’s gotten the distinct feeling the Slytherins had an extra motive when they moved the DA into the Chamber.  They’re just way too comfortable with the Room of Requirement. 

“Alright.”  Pansy says when no one else speaks up.  “Who’s going to take Year Three?”

“Not me.”  Theodore quickly refuses.  “I’ve got enough on my plate trying to figure out Year Six and Seven.”  

“No one’s going to learn anything if I take it.”  Draco claims.

“I’ve found my teaching style to be rather ineffective.”  Luna hums from her spot on the floor, newspapers surrounding her and some fancy pair of glasses over her eyes.  Neville doesn’t remember what those ones are meant to see, they might just be normal reading glasses.

“I can do it.”  He offers before anyone else can make excuses.  

“Brave man.”  Blaise says, face serious as he magics the lesson plans over.  There’s a lot here, Neville thinks with a sigh, it’s going to take a while to cut the stuff that’s not really important, and longer to turn the rest of it into quick after-curfew lessons.  Might as well start now.

* * *

Boggarts.

Neville hasn’t thought of the creatures in years.  Possibly not since third year, when he had this very class on the topic.  

“What are you staring at?”  Ginny questions a few minutes later, when Neville’s still staring at the page.  They’re in the Chamber tonight, having just finished up the nights lessons and now doing paperwork.  Sometimes Neville sits back and wonders how he ended up a teacher this year, and then he wonders why anyone would become a teacher.

“The boggarts lesson.”  He answers. 

“We won’t be able to do that one.”  Ginny frowns. “Where would we even get a boggart?”

“Ridikulus is still a good spell to learn.”  Neville argues. “I’ll have a look into other ways to teach it.”

“Theodore might know something.”  Ginny offers. “He’s as much of a spellworm as Hermoine.”  Neville smiles a little before it drops. It’s hard to stay smiling thinking about them.

“Do you remember what your boggart was?”  He asks.

“The diary.” Ginny answers, shrugging like it’s no big deal.  It still is, Neville can see that, but he thinks it’s actually less of a big deal this year.  Like revisiting the Chamber and Tiffany has helped. “I made it into one of those super fluffy ones.  What was yours?”

“Professor Snape.”  Neville admits with a wince.

“What?”  Ginny asks, unable to hold back her laughter.  “Snape was your biggest fear?”

“He was really scary back then!”  Neville argues. “Plus, I was trying really hard not to let it be my gran.”  He adds, mumbling.

“I wonder if he ever found out.”  Ginny hums are a minute.

“I hope not.”  Neville cringes at the very idea.  

“He probably did.”  Luna’s voice makes them both jump, turning to where the Ravenclaw has appeared from no where.  “I believe he and Professor Lupin are friends.”

“Jesus Luna.”  Ginny huffs. “We should make you wear a bell.”

“Or you should wear a watch.”  Luna says. “It’s almost time for the Ravenclaw’s watch.”

“Already?”  Ginny sighs.  “We should head to be then.”

“Right.”  Neville says, gathering his papers and standing.  “What?” He asks when Ginny holds out her hand.  

“Pass me your papers, you need to go to bed.”  She orders.

“I’m not going to stay up all night working on it.”  Neville argues.

“Maybe not on purpose.”  Luna says. Sighing again, Neville relents and hands over the paper.  Damn Blaise, letting it slip how little he’d been sleeping.  

Neville doesn’t stay up all night working on lesson plans.

Instead he stays awake thinking about how Snape’s been on their side all along, and Neville’s boggart looked like him.

* * *

Once more, Neville paces the length of the Room of Requirement wanting for a Slytherin to arrive.  Not Draco this time, definitely not Draco. Hopefully not Theodore either, actually. What he has planning won’t go down well with either of them.

“Oh no, that’s not a good face.”  Blaise comments as he steps inside.  Perfect. “What are you planning?”

“I need to get detention.”  Neville answers, still pacing.

“I’m sorry, what?”  Blaise frowns. “You realize the heat is already on you, right?  If those twins give you detention they might kill you.”

“I don’t need to get detention with the twins, I need detention with Snape.”  Neville explains. “I really need to talk to him.”

“About what?  I can pass a note.”  Blaise offers.

“No, I need to do this is person.”  Neville refuses. He stops pacing, turning to Blaise with determination in his gaze.  It was First Year that taught him to be stubborn, standing against Ron and Hermione’s attempt to sneak out.  Seventh Year has taught him not to let his fear stop him, although Blaise isn’t sure he’s noticed yet.

“Okay.”  He says. “I can’t get away with taking you to Snape, I’m not kind of kiss ass.”  

“We can’t go to Draco, or Theodore.  They’d never be okay with this.” Neville says.

“No, no they won’t be.”  Blaise agrees. “That just leaves Pansy.  Thankfully, she is that kind of kiss ass.”  He grins. They spend the rest of the hour planning how Neville will get detention.  

“We have to do it tonight.”  Neville decides. “The longer we wait the longer the others will have to figure us out.”

“And the more the twins will hate you.”  Blaise sighs. “Okay, I’ll get Pansy on board.  I’m sure she’ll agree, but if not I’ll send you a note.”

“Great.  Thanks for this.”  Neville nods.

“Just, don’t get caught by anyone expect Pansy, okay?  I don’t want to wake up to the news you’re dead.” Blaise says, maybe a little more seriously than he means too.  “It’d ruin my breakfast, that’s the most important meal of the day.” He adds, much less seriously.

“We can’t have that.”  Neville smiles, bumping their shoulders together.  “I’ll see you tomorrow.”  

“See you tomorrow.”  Blaise calls back. Neville leaves first, quickly heading back to the dorms before he can get grounded too early.

* * *

That night, at the appointed time, Neville sneaks through the halls.  Well he wouldn’t really use the word sneak, it’s more like he pretends to sneak around the halls.  Pansy is just as quiet, her steps echoing through the hall.  

“Oh look.”  She says, tone dramatic and loud.  “A Gyfindor out based curfew, you’re coming with me.”  

“Oh no!”  Neville responds, his tone equally are dramatic but also a lot less believable.

“Shut it.”  Pansy orders, grabbing Neville by the arm.  “I’m taking you straight to the headmaster, getting a hold of a DA member is sure to get me brownie points.”  She continues and okay now she’s making Neville a little nervous.

Not as nervous as he feels when they pass by the twins, but Pansy doesn’t even blink.  

“Back off.”  She snaps. “I’m getting the credit for this one.”

“Pity.”  One says, smirking in a way that makes Neville gulp.  “We were looking forward to getting a hold of him.”

“Maybe be a bit quicker next time then.”  Pansy says, then drags Neville further down the hall.  They’re silent until they’re riding up to the Headmaster’s office, the statue as soundproofed as the office itself.  Pansy immediately drops the wand that’s been pressed against Neville’s back, leaning against the wall with her arms crossed over her chest.

“I hate those two.”  She huffs. “They like to act like I’m some sort of apprentice to their cruelty.  Theodore too.”  

“Not Draco?”  Neville asks, because he’s noticed that Draco and Pansy seem to be a pair. 

“No, he plays the ‘I’m too good for you’ card.”  Pansy sighs. “I’d be jealous but he gets enough attention outside of school, he doesn’t need them on his back too.”  She sounds more sincere than usual, maybe he’s not the only one that hasn’t been sleeping well. As they near the room above, she changes the topic.

“This was incredibly stupid, you know.”  She says.

“I needed to talk to him.”  Neville shrugs. “Besides, I trust you and Blaise to have my back.”  He really did, Neville realizes. Just a year ago he’d cringe if Pansy so much as looked his way, now he honestly trusts her with his life.  

“That’s a bit stupid too.”  Pansy mumbles. She’s not sleep-deprived enough to continue, although Neville can see there’s something else there.  “It was a bit brave though.” She adds.

“Not really.”  Neville shakes his head.  “It’s just something I need to do.” 

“I don’t mean just right now Neville, I mean all of this.  The DA, trusting us, your night patrols. You’re a lot braver than you think.”  She elborates.

“I’m really not.  It just… someone needs to do it, you know?”  Neville tries to explain, a little uncomfortable with her praise.

“That’s what makes it brave idiot.”  Pansy scoffs. “Just take the compliment Longbottom, I’m not going to say it again.”  She’s starting to sound more annoyed than open. It’s a lot more familiar, so Neville offers a weak smile.

“Okay, thank you.”  He says. “You’re a lot more, well, good than you give yourself credit for.”  He adds, taking a shot in the dark at the shadows on her face earlier. With the way she startles with surprise, he thinks he hit pretty close.  Thankfully, they reach the office before she can respond. Headmaster Snape looks up from his desk, frowning.

“Mr Longbottom, I thought I told you not to get caught teaching hexes.”  He says.

“Actually, he was sneaking around this time.  Badly.” Pansy announces. That was entirely unfair, Neville thought, he was intentionally doing a terrible job.  “I’ll leave you two, warn anyone that comes close that you’re doing unspeakable and gruesome things.”

“That’ll just encourage them.”  Snape sighs, watching her leave once more.  Once she’s left, Neville feels all his fear and anxieties hit him immediately.  This is such a dumb idea, does Snape even care about something that happened four years ago?  Really, Neville is just wasting everyone’s time.

With a deep breath, Neville tries to push those thoughts away.  It wasn’t just about the boggart, and even if Snape didn’t care, Neville did.  

“So, you got caught sneaking about?”  Snape prompts when the silence drags on too long. 

“I, I wanted to apologize.”  Neville manages, forcing himself to meet Snape’s eye.

“Apologize?”  The headmaster repeats, frown deepening.

“For third year.”  Neville clarifies.

“And what, pray tell, did you do in third year that’s so horrible you feel the need to risk life and limb like this?”  Snape asks, placing down his quill and setting aside his papers to give Neville his full attention.

“You were my boggart.”  Neville blurts out and then winces.  Just barely, he catches the way Snape flinches.  So Snape does care, all the more reason for him to get this out.

“That’s hardly something you need to apologize for, you’re not the first student to find me terrifying.”  Snape says, tone dismissive and a touch bitter.

“But you’re not.”  Neville argues. “You never really were.  I mean you were a bit harsh but you weren’t cruel, and you had a lot more patience with me then… well, a lot of people back then.  You shouldn’t have been my boggart. It’s was just…” He trails off, not entirely sure how to word the next part in a good way.

“You don’t have to explain Longbottom.  You’re forgiven. Parkinson can escort you back to your dorm.”  Snape says. But Neville’s not going to leave it there, he needs Snape to understand why, and he needs Snape to understand he was wrong.

“Sir, please, just listen.”  He says, a bit more forceful than he’s ever managed with a teacher.  Snape seems surprised but, after a moment of hesitation, nods. “Back then my gran was my biggest fear.  But I didn’t… I didn’t want people to know that. So I was trying to think of something, anything else and… well…”  He sighs, trying to collect his thoughts. “You know what happened to my parents, don’t you?” He says, quiet and looking to the ground.

“I do.”  Snape confirms after a moment.

“Gran always blamed you for that, she built you up as this horrifying figure and I tried really hard to focus on that instead of her.  That’s why you were my boggart.” He explains.

“It was my fault.”  Snape says. “What happened to your parents, what happened to Harry’s… that happened because of my information.”

“Did you do it?”  Neville asks. It’s a question he used to ponder a lot when he was younger.  He doesn’t need to wonder anymore. “Did you tell them to?”

“Of course not!”  Snape answers, reconciling at the very idea.

“Then it’s not your fault.”  Neville says.

“But if I had been smarter, been quicker, it wouldn’t have happened.”  Snape argues.

“And if I hadn’t been born on that day, it wouldn’t have happened.”  Neville argues. “Those sorts of things aren’t in our control. Just like this whole situation with the school, and with You Know Who.”  He says. “But you’ve been helping despite how dangerous it is. Obviously you’ve been spying from the start but more than that you’ve been looking out for us all year.  That’s why I needed to apologize for third year. You should never have been my boggart, there’s nothing scary about you sir.” The words leave Snape stunned, Neville can tell that much, but when they finally commute he manages to see the smallest smile on the headmaster’s face.

“I can still be plenty scary.”  He assures. “But I’m glad you don’t think so.  Now you really should be heading to bed.”

“Okay.  Goodnight sir.”  Neville says, grinning ear to ear as he heads to leave.  Right as he’s reached the platform, Snape speaks up again. 

“You’re doing well in your studies, might not be a bad idea to take some time off class.  I hear there’s an easy few passages to Hogsmede, if you require them.” He warns.

“Thank you.”  Neville smiles, because he really doesn’t understand the way Slytherin’s dance around their kindness.  “For everything.”

It’s an effort to keep the smile off his face as he and Pansy walk back to Gryffindor Tower.  Pansy has to bump him a couple times to remind him to cool it. But he’s pretty sure she’s hiding a smile too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Couldn't decide if I wanted Luna/Ginny/Neville or Neville/Blaise so sadly no romance  
> Though tbf i think that's fitting for Neville as he is right now, romance is the first thing from his mind. Ginny's too.   
> Blaise definitely has a crush on Neville though. Luna is also crushing, I think, it's honestly hard to tell with her.


End file.
